


A Shadow of You

by czechia



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: (there's some gore in the first chapter and might reoccur but otherwise it's not a thing), F/M, Modern AU, Rey can see ghosts AU, Rey's just trying to run her book store and a CERTAIN ghost is bothering her, it's in the first chapter and he sticks around so he's not really gone, okay so there may be a major character death but...
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-07
Updated: 2017-08-10
Packaged: 2018-11-29 02:36:47
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 6
Words: 24,177
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11431410
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/czechia/pseuds/czechia
Summary: Rey knows what it's like to deal with spirits, the ones who beg, plead, and cry for her help. She's not exactly prepared for what you're supposed to do when you watch someone die and they come and find you afterwards. Shenanigans ensue and feelings develop.





	1. Chapter 1

Growing up, Rey had always seen the spirits that roamed. At first, she had openly tried to convince others of it, but as time wore on, she learned that this was a poor idea. Later, when she was older and knew better, she was sure that this is what stopped her from getting adopted in those early years. Maybe it was just her.

The foster system wasn’t the worst thing that could’ve happened to her, Rey often consoled herself, recalling stories she’d heard of others growing up in horribly broken homes. While she hadn’t _really_ been loved, she had been given the space to be herself, more or less. Kind of. She’d often heard that families were overrated and tried to let those statements override all the images she had been bombarded with growing up, images that depicted happy families as the peak of happiness.

Spirits, looking much like they had been when they were alive other than having a slight blue tinge to them, always provided company in the event that the living didn’t, even if it wasn’t always pleasant. Most times when they realized that Rey could see them, they were hooked, determined that she was the key to their passing on. It had taken years for her to stop reaching out to every spectral figure she’d see and offer them help, stopping herself from asking why they couldn’t rest. The only comfort that there seemed to be from the entire situation that the spirits disappeared six months after their death. Where they went, whether they had moved on or not, she was never sure, just glad that she was left in peace.

Occasionally, Rey found herself caving to a spirit who seemed particularly sad or pitiful. If there was a particularly young one then she felt the guilt gnaw at her until she spoke to them. Children just often needed to know what was going on, to be reassured that they were loved, that they were going to a happy place, to be able to move on. Despite the peace that it brought to both parties involved, the specters were always just that, specters. They weren’t people, not anymore, not to her. No matter the amount of times that she consoled herself with that statement, she could still sense their pain, could hear them when they would cry.

As it was, Rey had managed to scrape through life and work as the manager at her local bookstore located in Jakku, a speck of a town an hour from the capital. Growing up, books had been a refuge from the harsh reality that surrounded her and it had only made sense that such an interest translated into her studies, into what she imagined for herself.  She’d gone to university for four years and graduated with a degree in English literature of all things.

Once she’d moved to Jakku, she had taken up running as a means to keep herself in shape as well as explore the small town. There wasn’t really anything of note besides the junkyard strangely near the cemetery on the outskirts, although she was more than cautious of the graveyard; she didn’t need to bring home any spirits who might pester her for help.

The only reason Rey had even managed to land the position of manager, in her mind, was due to it being open for so long; she hardly believed the branch manager’s explanation that she was the most capable out of all the applicants.

She enjoyed the position, enjoying the control, the power that she had in shaping her future and that of the shop. Despite being the manager, she often found herself working normal shifts besides arranging for shipments of in-demand and up-and-coming books; she practically handled all there was to do with Discount Books. It was all very manageable to a twenty -year-old Rey who took solace in the shop’s cozy interior more than she would care to admit.

The other plus to Discount Books was the fact that it was on the other side of the town from cemetery, out of the way of any pesky spirits who might try and pass their time knocking over books just so they could read or try and get her attention. She understood their plight, she really did, but she all she wanted to do was to keep the shop in order for as long as she could.

In her two years working at the store, Rey grew to take pride in how she had managed to improve the place. She started small projects which made the business more appealing, such as repainting parts of the interior which had been badly in need of some care, and her habit of placing flowers in the windowsills of the large windows sitting in the front of the shop. It all made the place feel more like home, or at least more comfortable.

While the store wasn’t exactly in the middle of nowhere, it certainly wasn’t in a city or town large enough where she ever worried about crime. Sure, there were some petty thefts here and there, but never at Discount Books or any shops that even resembled it. No one wanted to steal books, of that, Rey was certain. Her corner of the town never dealt with much drama or attracted attention in the two years that she had lived there.

Despite the unchanging nature of Jakku, she had managed to make a friend. Finn had passed through the town and stopped at her shop looking for books for his classes in the capital. She offered far more affordable process and while they’d gone over what was in stock, had struck up a conversation about his studies.

Finn, an exchange student from the US, was working towards a business degree, with aims to get involved with the changing the world’s discussions about the environment. He started to come by semi-regularl;, about once every two weeks she was greeted by his smile as he walked through the front door.

Rey was glad for the business as well as the friendship that he provided; most people in Jakku kept to themselves. When they did reach out and get to know someone, it was bound to turn into local gossip, no matter how routine of an interaction it was. She had already experienced the phenomenon once herself, having dated someone from the capital only for it to circulate throughout the small town. Nothing had come of the failed relationship except hurt feelings on both sides. Finn was different.

He offered a true chance at friendship, helped her forget all those she had left behind when she had left university. She would occasionally offer to help find books for his papers, even offering to read over some of his papers when they were assigned. There were several times when she would point out spelling errors his professors might dock him for, adding ‘u’s and changings ‘s’s to ‘c’s when necessary. He helped keep the tedium of working at Discount Books from driving her up the walls, texting her at least once a week to see how it was going.

Otherwise, day-to-day life was uneventful for Rey.

She occasionally wondered about her parents long ago had given up trying to track them, realizing that the cost of doing so was far out of her meager budget. One day, she silently promised herself when she was awake late at night, she would find them. She would accept them for whatever they were, for whatever reason they had left her. She hoped that they had had a decent reason, at least.

She always used the early morning runs to clear her mid and try and go through her list of responsibilities ranging from the shop to her flat a few blocks away, and the early Tuesday morning of the first week of April was no different. She laced up her trainers, zipped up her hoodie, and stepped out into the damp, morning air. It had been raining up until a few minutes ago; Rey was glad that it let up so that she’d at least be in less danger of slipping.

She was typically the only one out running at that time in the morning, although she always spotted people waiting for the bus into the capital. Her normal route led her down the front of the shop, and went to the edge of Jakku before looping around crossing the main road that most passersbys entered the city through.

Rey was about to round the corner of the bookshop, hoodie drawn up to protect her from the light drizzle that still seemed to hang in the air, when she heard the roar of a motorbike’s engine. She was frozen in place as she watched it whiz past, the driver clad in black but without a matching helmet.

She heard metal scraping along pavement, a long, ugly noise that finally ended with the sound of metal crashing into concrete come from around the corner of the shop.

Rey wasn’t sure what she was supposed to do, what to think; all she could get herself to do was _move,_ to try and see what had just happened, despite the sinking feeling in her gut. She ran forward, blind to anyone else who might’ve been a witness to the accident. When she came around the corner she saw the horrible reality of what she had just heard.

She first saw the blood stain that crept up the pavement, ending at a heap of twisted metal and-

There was a body. At first Rey thought it was lifeless, but then she saw a slight movement, a pained intake of breath. The man who had been driving was bleeding from his head, his skull quite clearly cracked open and the skin along his right side of his body had been… for a lack of a better word, _sheared_ off. She had taken CPR and first aid classes years ago but she wasn’t sure how much that would help considering his black hair was matted with blood.

Rey ran up to and crouched next to the man who seemed to barely be hanging on, her hands hovering over his left shoulder which still was clothed with a leather jacket. He was resting on his mangled right side, and as her fingers gingerly rested on his good side, she made out what she could of what was left of his features.

The man looked like he was already out of it, eyes half-open and mouth ajar. Later, Rey would remember the way he looked at her, confused and panicked right as the breath went out of him. She’d been crouched beside him for a few moments before he went limp before her eye, body sagging as she removed her hands from his arm.

She was staring at a corpse.

Panic kicked in and she turned away from it, turning her back on him before she noticed several people already on their phones, staring at the scene and watching her. They must’ve heard the sound and left their flats, their stops, _whatever._ She felt sick, wanted to just forget that she had seen anything; seeing ghosts was completely different that seeing people _die_. The image of his eyes going dull and his body sagging completely before her kept repeating every time she closed her eyes-

Rey wrapped her arms around herself and stumbled back in the direction of her flat, run forgotten and hands shaking as she pulled her keys out, trying to fit them in the lock. She cursed when she closed the door behind her, resting her back against it and sliding down to sit on the floor.

She stared down at her hands, clenching them and then flexing them before she noticed her shoes. She must’ve stepped in some of his blood, it had been pooling around him when she’d neared him, hadn’t it? She hadn’t tracked blood in, exactly, rather it just seemed to have stained her light blue trainers, turning some of the fabric and plastic a sickly purple with flecks of dark red.  

Rey kicked her shoes off and remained sitting against the door, staring at her apartment, gaze idly passing the bookshelf in her main room. She heard the roar of police sirens, of an ambulance, maybe even more vehicles down the street.

She still had to open the shop in two hours.

She slowly forced herself to stand, to shower, to get dressed, to slip the shop sign to read ‘OPEN’, to bring out books for shelving. She’d ignored the scene around the corner of the shop when she’d entered Discount Books, gaze focused on unlocking the business and strictly what she needed to do outside. She pretended not to see the people staring at her shop via the open windows; the original shop had been an antique store and had worked to showcase trinkets, but now Rey just felt like she was being put under a microscope for examination.

She knew that she should probably talk to someone, to Finn, to process the fact that she’d just watched a man die in front of her, could still hear the sound as his last breath left him, that everything was probably not okay. Rey knew all of this and yet she _knew_ that she could handle it; it was just a new experience. A horrifying one, but still, just an experience.

She knew that she would probably keep thinking about it for weeks, maybe months, to come, that some images wouldn’t leave her so easily, but she could work with what she could anticipate.

What wasn’t expected, however, was seeing the man she had just watched _die_ standing outside the front of the shop. She could tell that he must’ve been older than her when he was alive, his features looking stressed in his corporal state. He was sporting his leather jacket with what she now could tell were far nicer clothes underneath, hair almost to his shoulder now that it was no longer chewed up by blood.

Death seemed to suit him better than dying.

Rey stood in the front of the shop, watching as blue-tinted man stood with his back to her, watching the occasional stranger move towards the area of the accident. He seemed frustrated, to be looking for something, and although she considered reaching out to him, she knew that there was nowhere good that meddling could lead. She’d be stuck with some reckless man who’d ignored the weather, speed limits, and exactly where he was going, for six months. She didn’t any more complications in her life.

She did, however, let herself take his shape in, appreciating that he no longer suffering, well, at least not in the physical sense. She knew that dying could drive some people crazy.

Maybe he could feel her gaze on him, because after several long moments of being stared at, he turned to meet her gaze through the shop’s glass. If Rey hadn’t just watched him die, maybe she would’ve been able to pretend that it was nothing like she had done so many times before, that she didn’t see the _way_ he looked at her, as if he was looking _into_ her.

She quickly looked away and blinked as she fervently began to go through files behind the front desk, hoping that the spirit would just let her be, let her move on. She kept her gaze pointedly on the books and things undeath the register, trying to ignore anything the man might try. She would _not_ let herself get dragged into another sob story that would just make her feel horrible for the next half a year

Rey worked quietly, crouched as she tried not to remember exactly how she had been doing that over his dead body only hours ago. She tried not to recall the horrible way he’d taken in and released his last breath, how he’d looked at her, _knew_ her, in his last moments.

The bell of someone entering the shop jingled and Rey jerked at the sudden sound, hitting the back of her head on the wood surface before she scrambled to stand behind the counter. Instead of being met with the face of the man she’d watched die, she smiled in relief as it only appeared to be a judgmental senior woman; this she could deal with.

She scanned behind her for the spirit and when she saw no one else around, she let out a breath of relief, returning to the newest customer. The woman requested a cooking book, one that Rey realized had just come in and would still be in the back.

Rey excused herself and began her search for the book in the book storage room, skimming the names of various titles as she opened various boxes and walked around the backroom. The stockroom itself was small and cozy like everything in her life, just enough space for the various boxes and books that they needed, two dim lights illuminating the space.

Someone must’ve misshelved the box, she decided, groaning at the realization when she spotted the box that the cookbook had to be in. It was on top of the selves that she had one of her employees stock earlier in the week, perched atop the shelving unit situated in the middle of the room.

Rey groaned to herself and grabbed the stepladder in the corner of the room, setting it up with a small sigh. Climbing up, she realized that it was still slightly too short; her fingers just barely brushed the bottom of the box. Rey would be able to get it, just barely, but she prepared herself for the fenagling that she would have to do, how much she would have to rely on her balance to prevent it from tumbling down.

She pressed up on the tips of her toes, about to grab the box before she blinked in confusion. The box must’ve gained momentum on its own because before she could even take in another breath, the box full of amateur cookbooks came tumbling down.

Rey retracted her hands from the box and used what reaction time she had to grab onto the metal shelving in front of her, gripping as intensely as she could to avoid being knocked down. The box was heavy and crashed into her left shoulder back before it tumbled to the ground. She was going to have a bruise later.

She cursed under her breath, watching as the cardboard box settled below her, looking a little bent but otherwise no worse for wear. She’d have to send out an email to everyone to remind everyone not to _balance_ boxes but rather have them _set down_ properly.

 She looked up at where the box had been one last time, shooting it a nasty look before looking back down at her next objective. That, however, was unexpectedly blocked by the tall man, or rather, spirit, from earlier, his arms crossed as he stood over the box. He was sporting an almost childish pout, although his brows were furrowed with an intense sort of seriousness. She returned the frown at the realization that _he_ must’ve knocked the box down, had almost knocked _her_ down.

Rey wasn’t sure if she was happy when she heard him speak, accent clearly American, but was hit with an unclear emotion when he did. He sounded how he looked, annoyed.

“Oh, so _now_ you can see me?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't worry, I'm still working on An Empire's Fall, but I've had this idea of ages and just wanted to get it out of my system. I'm not sure how long this work will be BUT it should be fun. 
> 
> Let me know what you think! ;)
> 
> [As always, you can find me on tumblr at kyloheyo]


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “You could check the news, probably.”
> 
> Rey rolled her eyes, watching as he stopped in front of her.
> 
> “I’d rather you just tell me, Mr-I-like-to-kill-people-with-boxes.”

Rey stared at the man, the spirit, in front of her before she tried her hardest to pretend that they hadn’t made eye contact. It wasn’t going to work but she wasn’t about to give up the charade just yet. She turned her gaze to the box in front of her and ignored the corporeal figure, not caring that the front half of her body was intersecting his as she turned the box over.

“Stop pretending like you can’t see me, I’m not an idiot.”

She opened the box, skimming over the titles it contained. It was a mix of various cookbook titles and she frowned when she couldn’t immediately find the book that the customer had wanted. Suddenly, as she thought she spotted the title she was looking for, she was face-to-face with the man she had been working so hard to avoid.

“BOO!” he shouted and Rey let out a short scream, falling back from her hunched position over the box. She landed on her bottom and automatically scrambled backwards, taking deep breaths as she got a grip on reality. Throwing all pretense out the window, she stared back at the blue-tinted man, eyes narrowing. He was crouched behind, if not someone inside of the box, arms resting on his legs as he looked smugly on.

“Fuck _you._ ”

“I wouldn’t have had to resort to that if you had just _talked_ to me.”

“Whoever you are, I’ve a job to do and I can’t spend my entire day humoring you.” She picked herself up, brushing off any dust that might’ve gotten on her from the falling box or the floor. They rarely cleaned the back room and even she didn’t have it high on her priority list.

The man didn’t move, remaining crouched nearby. As he was right near the books, she was forced to approach him yet again, although Rey kept her gaze strictly on the books inside of the box. She pretended not to notice his hazy blue outline of his thighs and calves and business shoes, spotting the title she needed despite his presence.

When she stood, book in hand, the action seemed to prompt him to speak again.

“I’m _dead_ , I would think that you might have a little sympathy for me.” He joined her in standing, a good six inches taller than her. No matter, that didn’t mean that he was any more dangerous than any other spirit, which meant he was practically harmless. Besides the business with the box, at least.

“Just because you’re dead doesn’t mean that you’re a good person.” Rey looked over to him and shrugged when he made a face at her, something between a grimace and a glare. “Just let me be, I’ve got my own responsibilities and I don’t need some spirit trying to dissuade me from them.”

She turned her back on him and returned to the elderly woman still waiting by the counter. The woman must’ve heard the small commotion in the back room, as she took Rey in once more.

“I just tripped, one of the boxes was in the way.” Rey tried not to stare as the spirit walked up to the counter and stood behind the older woman, watching the entire interaction in silence. She smiled at her customer and set the book on the counter before scanning and bagging, accepting payment before the woman left.

Rey kept the act up until the bell jingled as the door shut and they were left alone once more. She kept her back to the window, gaze trained on the man whom she’d watched die only a few hours ago. She tried not to imagine him as he had been then, with blood everywhere.

“Who are you?” she asked, hands gripping the edge of the counter behind her, assessing as much as she could from this clothing. She guessed that he had been involved in some sort of business, white-collar work, gauging by his clothes, but she couldn’t figure out why he would go out like he had on a motorbike.

It was a risk, it always was, to get to know a spirit. They were capable of unending amounts of hope, for which Rey could hardly blame them, but it was always an incontinence for her.

He crossed his arms, taking a slow step and passing through the counter. She had asked a spirit once, ages ago, if it ever hurt for them to pass through physical objects. The spirit, a young woman, had assured her that it didn’t, that the scariest thing was just getting through thick walls that left you blind when passing through them.

“You could check the news, probably.”

Rey rolled her eyes, watching as he stopped in front of her.

“I’d rather you just tell me, Mr-I-like-to-kill-people-with-boxes.”

He snorted as he looked down, holding his hand out in front of him. For split second Rey wondered if he was going for a handshake, but he just looked his arm over.

“I was just trying to see exactly what I could do in this… form. It’s a bit of a shock when you realize that you’re dead.”

“I’m sure.” She let a small silence pass before continuing. “What’s your name?”

“Kylo Ren, and you?”

Rey knew that spirit, this man, Kylo Ren, whoever he was, the more he knew about her, the more that he would fixate on her as a source of socialization, something she did _not_ want.

“I’m no one.”

He made a face. “That’s not fair.”

“Is Ren your last name?"

“You first.”

“Fine,” she let go of the counter. “I’m Rey.”

“Kylo is my first name.”

“It’s weird.” She paused and bit her lip to hide the smirk that threatened to make an appearance.

He looked perturbed, noticing the shift in her expression. “What exactly are you smiling about? It’s a decent name.”

“Maybe for an American.”

“Oh, you’re certainly little miss sunshine here, aren’t you?” Kylo looked annoyed and stepped away, letting his gaze roam around the shop.

“Well, my name is _Rey_.” She’d heard the joke so many times in her life that she was genuinely surprised that he hadn’t opted to make the pun on his own.

“I thought I was being polite by not bringing it up.”

“At what point were you trying to be polite?”

Rey sighed and turned away from him, going to the desktop that sat on the same counter as the register, sitting on her familiar friend, a raised swivel chair. She settled in and checked some of their inventory, doing her best to ignore the hulking spirit in the background. She hoped that he took the hint.

He didn’t.

She glanced outside the shop, noting that the motorbike had yet to be towed away. She hoped that no one spotted her talking to herself at least; she knew how hard it was to lose the stigma that came with it. As it was, she’d worked hard to avoid earning it in Jakku after several unfortunate happenings in the capital.

“Look,” Rey stated after a few minutes of his wandering around and her pretending to type up something important. He stopped his looking at some of the titles of historical novels and looked her way. “You’ve got six months before you ‘move on’ or whatever, you should probably spend that time getting to those who are most important to you, discover some inner truth, whatever it is. Figure out what’s holding you back.”

Kylo seemed to tense up but moved no closer, simply lingering in the middle of the book shelves, looking back at them as he spoke.

“Is there a God, a heaven or hell that I’ll go to?”

“I don’t know. Spirits just… they fade away and I never see them again, regardless of religious or spiritual beliefs.”

“How can you not know?” He frowned, voice notching up a level in intensity. Great, she was going to be haunted by an angry and evil spirit with a bad temper, just what she needed.

“Just because spirits talk to me doesn’t mean that I have all the answers; I’m not a medium, not a witch, I don’t know anything about the occult other than you, or _whatever_ you are.”

“You can say ghost, you know, since that’s what I am.”

“I’m aware of that fact.”

She let her gaze linger on Kylo before returning to checking the stocks of their books, although she already knew that she wouldn’t have to order anything for another couple of weeks.

There was another spell of silence, Rey sitting there watching as he walked around and seemed to think, tried to process it all. It had been a long time, years, since she had engaged with a spirit on this level, had tried to explain anything, had any of them attempt to get information out of her. As it was, it didn’t seem like she was going to be able to get rid of him anytime soon, not with how much of a pain he was being.

“How old are you?” she asked after several long minutes, resting her chin in her palm.

“That’s rude.”

“You’re _dead_.”

“I’m thirty.”

“I’m twenty-two.”

Kylo didn’t look impressed, although he began to make his way away from the books and towards her, stopping in front of the counter. It was almost as if he was a customer; that would make the entire situation far easier.

“Good for you.”

“You seem to have had your life figured out, haven’t you? Although I don’t know why you’d go out in that outfit on your motorbike of all things.”

“I wasn’t thinking.”

“Clearly.”

His expression flickered between annoyance and anger as he leant down, hands on the counter as he leaned down. His gaze met hers, harsh and unforgiving,

“My motorcycle is trashed and I’m _dead_ so I don’t think my fashion choices should matter at this point.”

“What _does_ matter to you?” Kylo said nothing, sizing her up. “Look, whatever stopped you from moving on in the first place, if you want to be rid of this life, plane of existence, however you want to call it, you need to resolve some of your issues.”

“And what do you know about my _issues_?”

“Nothing, which needs to change if you want to go on to the afterlife. Think about what you need to get done and then maybe we can get somewhere.”

The man in front of her pulled back, quickly schooling his features.

“So, I need to complete my unfinished business and then I’ll ‘pass on’?”

Rey nodded, shifting back into her chair. She toyed with the end of her ponytail, watching Kylo’s expression shift as he thought. If she was lucky, then his business would take him somewhere else, to the capital, to the US, out of her hair. It didn’t matter if she’d watched him die, if he had stared at her as he died, whatever there was between them would be done with once he was gone.

She considered herself lucky when another customer arrived and Kylo, out of habit from being mortal, stepped away, going to wander about the shop. The customer, a middle-aged man, seemed to roam about a bit, taking longer than Kylo needed, apparently.

The spirit walked back up to the counter and she glanced at him before going back to looking at books behind the desk.

“I’ve figured out what I need to happen before I can pass on.”

Rey ignored his gaze, grabbing some books in her arms and moving to shelve some of them. When she passed by the isle with the older man shopping, she paused and threw him a smile.

“Just let me know if you need anything.”

The man, peering at her from behind the spectacles, nodded before going back to his perusing of the books. She worked on restocking a few of the books, resisting the urge to roll her eyes at Kylo as he stalked up to her.

“Look, I know you don’t want to look like you’re crazy with a customer around, but we need to start planning for what we need to get done.”

Rey stared at him, raising her brows at his assumption that she was just about to put her life on hold and do what he wanted. The man still shopping was bound to only be a few meters away and so she held her tongue. She just grimaced and went back to work.

“Rey.” Her frowned faltered at the sound of her voice, but she shook her head softly. Kylo huffed, hands already curling into fists in frustration.

“Miss?” The customer called from a few shelves away, and Rey gave the spirit one last look before turning her back on him and helping the older man.

She helped the man purchase the book and once again, she was alone with the bothersome spirit.

“ _Kylo_ ,” she tried his name out, watching as he loomed on the other side of the counter. She leant forward and rested her weight against the surface, “I’m not about to leave Jakku just because you want me too.”

“You don’t even know what I need done.”

“Spirits’ always put their needs before mine, and I highly doubt that your business that needs to be taken care of on this side of the pond.”

Rey had been approached by spirits who wanted her to travel all across the world, to give a message to a distant relative or someone who they had to make up with. Once, an elderly woman turned spirit had begged for Rey to travel to Thailand so that she could give a message to her sister. Rey had objected for multiple reasons, one, she didn’t have the time nor money to travel, and for another, she didn’t speak any Thai. The spirit had reassured her that she could teach Rey enough to get by, but it was far out of her means and wants.

He grimaced. “I just need _one_ thing done and then I can fucking move on.”

“If it can’t be done in Jakku, then I’m not helping you.”

Kylo’s gaze went dark and he leveled a glare her way. Rey just gave a small shake of her head as he went to speak.

“What will it take for you to get it through that thick skull of yours?” She closed her eyes for a moment, and when she spoke again, she enunciated every word as clearly as she could. “I’m. Not. Leaving. Jakku. Now give up.”

The spirit curled his fists, glowering at her before he seemed to consider what she had to say.

“Answer one thing for me,” he demanded. “What are you waiting for here in Jakku?”

Rey rolled her eyes and turned her attention to the computer.

“It was nice meeting you, Kylo, but you need to focus on reconciling whatever’s going on with you; you don’t need me to do that and while I’d help if I could, I don’t need this type of distraction in my life.”

“You were there when I died.” Any pretense of work dropped as she looked his way. She’d been trying to push the incident out of her mind as soon as she could, been trying not to see it whenever she looked out her window or looked at his previously mangled shape.

“Might’ve done.”

“Why?” In their limited interactions, he had seemed like an open book, fully expressing his anger when he seemed to feel it and now, he was on the edge of something akin to vulnerability. She wasn’t sure what to make of it.

“Why do you think?” Rey bit her lip, tone softening before she spoke again. “You were dying, you were alone, I thought that-” she shook her head and stopped herself. “No one deserves to die alone.”

Kylo straightened up, the lines of his mouth seeming less severe as he processed her response.

“You didn’t need to.”

“I know.”

There was a long stretch of silence before Rey gave him a half smile and turned her attention to the books behind the counter. She picked up the box and went to the first shelf that customers saw, knowing that although they had many repeat customers, first impressions mattered.

Spirits, as a rule, didn’t make any noise as they moved. Rey had seen the phenomenon on several occasions before, and while she _should_ have heard his footsteps as Kylo left, she didn’t. For that she was grateful.

She worked for a few hours, trying to put her mind to shelving, taking care of customers, and pretending not to hear as they cleaned up the scene of the accident. By the end of the day she was glad to see the wreckage and police gone, the blood stain that she had previous walked over removed.

She didn’t see him anywhere in the shop, he wasn’t lurking in the back room, nor anywhere outside of the establishment.

When Rey finished her eight-hour shift, she traded off with one of the newer employees at four in the evening. Helen had recently moved to Jakku to retire and had been looking for something to keep herself busy during the day. Rey had been glad to find someone with work experience and was reliable enough to leave alone to close the shop, as well as teach others about how to take care of the shop. While the shop was never open very late, it was one of the prime times for customers and Helen was always willing to take the shorter shift.

Rey sighed as she made her way to her apartment, glancing out at the evening light that settled over the town. She was grateful for the small apartment building that she’d managed to find a home for herself in; most people had to rent homes or duplexes. In the afternoon light, she could almost pretend that everything from the morning never happened, that she didn’t have the thread of a spirit looming over her shoulder.

She adjusted her purse strap over her shoulder as took the aged stairs to her flat on the first floor. The owner of the building had moved into the apartment on the ground floor six months after Rey had moved in, claiming that she wanted to be ‘closer to family.’ Rey had never believed her story, although she had no other information to work off of.

Entering her apartment, she tried to relax her muscles, dropping her purse and hoodie on her couch before she moved to the kitchen to take stock of her dinner situation. Rey peered into the fridge and frowned at her leftover Chinese food; she only had one more days’ worth.

She continued to look for more options in her freezer, considering other choices when she heard someone clear their throat behind her.

Rey’s muscles immediately tensed and she practically twisted herself in two trying to turn around quickly enough.

It was Kylo fucking Ren again.

He looked just as determined as before and now he knew where she lived. She was _thrilled_.

“Did you _stalk_ me to find my flat?”

“It’s not that hard to find someone in a town like this.”

“So you just decided to lurk around my workplace until I left, is that it?”

He made a face, standing there with his arms crossed. Rey briefly wondered if he was trying to look intimidating, what with his broad shoulders and height.

“I wasn’t lurking, I just didn’t want to sit around that closet of a shop all day and have you ignoring me.”

“And you decided that breaking into my flat was a better decision than loitering? Brilliant.” She closed the fridge behind her and brushed past him, heading back to her living room.

“I have no one else to go,” Kylo stated from behind her. “You have to help me pass on.”

Rey sat on her couch, a used one that she had managed to find in decent condition, and rested her arm on the back of it as she looked back at the spirit. It was clear that he was not going to give up the issue as easily as she had hoped; spirits never did.

“I’m not agreeing to help,” she clarified, “but what exactly is your unfinished business?”

He uncrossed his arms, although he seemed to barely be able to meet her gaze.

“My uncle needs to be taken care of.”

Rey leveled a look at Kylo as the implications of what he was suggesting settled in.

“Are you serious?”

“Of course I am!” His expression darkened and he took a step closer. “He has something that’s a danger to everything that I’ve worked for my entire life.”

She opened her mouth to speak, to express her utter disgust at the request, how petty a thing it was to kill someone simply because they ‘had something.’

“Leave me alone.” Rey stated, tone as harsh as she could manage.

“What? You can’t just get rid of me, you’re the only one who can help.”

“Sod off, go find some medium or someone else who will deal with your murderous shite.” She turned her back on him, staring at the small television pushed against the wall across from her. Her distorted reflection stared back at her, as did Kylo’s.

“If you knew who I am, you wouldn’t be treating me like this. If you knew the things I’ve done-”

“You’re dead. It doesn’t matter what you _were_ , what you’ve _done_ , just what you need to do. Go do it on your own.”

The spirit stood behind her and instead of moving towards the flat’s front door, she watched as he sat at her meager kitchen table.

“I think I’ll make myself comfortable here.”

Rey wanted to deck him.

While Kylo Ren might’ve deigned himself her new roommate, she was not in the mood to humor him. Of all the spirits she could be stuck with, she was stuck with a self-entitled arsehole who wanted her to go god-knows where and do whatever the hell ‘take care of’ his uncle meant. Considering how the spirit was dressed, she hoped it was just corporate espionage, although he hadn’t corrected her assumption regarding murder.

Rey spent the rest of the evening trying to ignore the man lurking about her flat, the way he seemed to sit as if he belonged in the kitchen chair that was clearly too small for him. While he wasn’t being cruel, Rey did wonder how far he would go in order to enlist her help. She was less worried about any verbal barbs he might send her way, her mind replaying the incident in the storeroom.

She wasn’t completely sure that she believed Ren when he said that he had been trying to ‘help’ her back then. A part of her wondered if he had hopes that she would fall and crack her head, get revenge for ignoring her. Then again, he hadn’t tried actually _pushing_ her or physically assaulting her, so that was a plus.

There were different standards for spirits that for people; Rey had learned this lesson over multiple encounters with countless spirits. Living people had laws to obey, authority to respect, repercussions to face. Spirits had none of that. Spirits had limits to their abilities, but that was it; there was nothing stopping the truly heinous ones from pushing people off bridges, driving paranoid people mad by messing with their electronics, and wreaking havoc in general.

When she settled down in her bed later that night, she simply closed the door. Ren, while a complete and utter tit, had shown some attempt at civility when she’d showered and sat on her laptop on the couch. Sure, he’d lurked about and prodded her for conversation when she was in the shared living space, but otherwise he had sat silently for the most part. She almost wondered if he was thinking about something, the way his eyes wandered and how when they weren’t talking, seemed shut off from the world.

Once she was curled up in bed, Rey wasted no time in Googling ‘Kylo Ren,’ curiosity gnawing at her. While she wouldn’t allow herself to ask Ren exactly what he did, she wasn’t about to stop herself from searching him on her own, especially when she had the privacy to do so.

Maybe, Rey considered as the search results pulled up headline after headline reading ‘KYLO REN FATAL ACCIDENT’ and the like, she should have expected more than a simple line about him. Instead of clicking the first link that popped up, she briefly scrolled down her screen, curious as to exactly how many people had written about his death. She had guessed that there might be something about him in a nightly report, not that her entire first page of search results was flooded with flashy headlines.

She frowned and scrolled back to the first result, published by a news stations based in the capital. She read the article five times, rolling onto her back and holding her phone above her as she tried to process it. Maybe, just maybe, Rey should have considered the possibility that Kylo Ren was a high-ranking employee of the biggest corporations in the world.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, I hope you enjoyed the continuing sage of ghost!Kylo and poor Rey who just wants to live her life without enacting his vendettas. I wonder what else she'll find out about him via Google; I guess we'll see next time...
> 
> As always, if you have any thoughts I'd love to hear them and you can find me on tumblr at kyloheyo :)


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “You want to be friends? I never thought that I’d be Casper.”

Rey knew that the First Order was a ruthless UK-based corporation whose main opponent she learned happened to be headed by Kylo’s mother, Leia Organa. It was a US based company, and while both competitors owned other, smaller companies, The First Order had a far worse public image. Leia Organa’s company, from what Rey knew from her time in the capital years ago, was called The Senate, although it had no connection to the government.

Rey ended up reading nearly every article that she came across. She had heard about The First Order and The Senate in passing, she had not ever sought out information about them, so when she first saw the article about Leia Organa’s ‘tragedy,’ she wasn’t sure what to make of it.

She clicked on the link and when she finished reading the piece, she lay in shock in her bed. The article detailed how earlier that day, Leia Organa’s son had tragically passed away in a case of reckless driving, only hours after his father had passed away in the capital. Rey peered through the darkness, through her door, and tried to imagine the spirit sitting on her couch.

The article had stated that Kylo had been at the hospital with his mother and father, and had been with them when his father passed, but details surrounding Han Solo’s death were still unclear. He had apparently been having heart problems while on a trip to the UK and at the time of his death he had been hospitalized at a local hospital; it wasn’t clear if that was how he passed.

It began to make sense in Rey’s mind, why he was so upset, so persistent about his goals, but then again why would he be so concerned with his _uncle_ and the business if his father had just died? Most spirits, once they realized that they were dead and that their effect on the world was far more limited, simply tried to work on self-realization, less on changing the fates of others. It seemed that the death of his father had added something else to the mix.

Rey spent more time than she’d care to admit looking Kylo up on the internet, from his severely limited Wikipedia page, to various magazines that he’d been featured in. He was never quoted as saying anything too revolutionary, statements only working to improve the image of the First Order. Despite making claims that helped the company, he came off as cold and aloof in interviews and press statements. In addition, she found a trashy article talking about his horrible tempter, something she had seen hints of.

Around 6:00, Rey heard her tv start up in the living room. She groaned and dragged herself out of bed, shrugging one of her hoodies on over her pajamas and running her hand over her face before she opened her bedroom door. She frowned as she was faced with the antics of the troublemaker that was currently rooming with her. Kylo stood over the television with his hands on it, back to her as the tv flicked between channels.

She had seen spirits mess with technology before, that part of their portrayal in media was accurate, and he seemed to have realized that aspect of his abilities. She watched as he tensed his muscles and the screen would flick between various channels, from one of the news stations to some mindless show.

“Bored?” Rey asked before she steadied herself and walked over to the television. He looked over at her, seeming to take in her disheveled state before he turned back to the screen.

“Contrary to popular belief, you can’t actually sleep when you’re dead, so what else am I supposed to do?” She blinked and pressed the power button on the side of the television, turning it off. She promptly turned away and made her way back to the comfort of bed. “Hey!” Kylo protested.

As she neared her bedroom, doorway just within reach, Rey heard the television turn back on. She sighed, sagging against the doorframe, back to the annoyance. She closed her eyes and tried to block out the incessant noise before giving in and shutting the door. The day before, she had opened the shop at eight am out of a want to have something to do, to avoid thinking back to Kylo’s death, but technically it didn’t need to be opened until 9:00; she just needed to be in the shop doing some type of work by 8:00.

Lying in bed, Rey listened to the channels changing at Kylo’s whim, although in the end, he settled on on a news station. She listened to a few minutes of the news anchor, trying to pick up exactly what the man said as he covered Kylo Ren’s death. Everything from the night before rushed to the forefront of her thoughts, the blazing headlines about his family and all.

Rey dressed and made her way into to the main room, combing her still-damp hair with her fingers. The spirit sitting on the couch heard her enter and glanced back, eying the way that she was crudely brushing her hair. She didn’t mind the stare; the brush in her bathroom wasn’t a priority at the moment.  

Kylo glanced back at the news for a moment before returning to Rey.

“I looked you up last night,” she stated, moving through the room toward the kitchen. She could feel his gaze on her back and wondered what he was thinking. “You were right, I should’ve just checked the news if I wanted to find out who you were.”

“Do you now understand why I need to finish what I’ve started?”

“No, and I don’t understand why you drove all the way out here from the capital in shite weather.” She poured herself a cold cup of coffee and placed the mug in the microwave. “I also heard about your father.”

The spirit sat up straighter and as Rey turned back to him, she watched his expression shift into something else, something akin to a mask.

“Yes, he passed away only a few hours before I did.”

“You don’t seem very torn up about it.”

“I’ve had a lot of time to think about it since it happened; it was a very unfortunate circumstance.”

“It’s only been twenty-four hours since _you’ve_ died, and he-”

“He was _my_ father, not yours.” The indignity in his voice was palpable, although what followed sounded scripted. “Although I know he and my mother were well known figures, and he’ll be missed by many.”  

Rey stared at him, unable to comprehend how a man like him, who had a loving family and success in the mortal world, could be so brittle and almost petulant regarding the death of his _father_ of all things. She had never even _had_ a chance at a family, the type of life he seemed to disregard completely.

“You don’t even _care_ that he’s gone.”

“I wouldn’t say _that_ ,” his gaze flicked away. “You didn’t even _know_ him, otherwise you’d realize you’re sticking up for a man who wouldn’t deserve it; if you had known him, he would’ve disappointed you.”

“Your mother just lost her husband _and_ her son within the span of a few hours and you don’t even care!”

Kylo’s gaze snapped back to Rey, mask cracking as he attempted to stare a hole through her. “You don’t know _anything_ about my family, or do you always believe what’s in the tabloids?”

“I read that you disowned them, but despite that, you went to go see your father in the intensive care unit.” She watched as his hands curled into fists, jaw set as he ground his teeth. “You throw away your family, treat their death and pain like nothing; you don’t even want to see your mother now that you’re dead!”

Kylo sat in place, muscles coiling before he stood, posture rigid. She got the sense that he was barely controlling whatever was begging to be released. “Shut the _fuck_ up, at least I’ve made something for myself. Do you think I _want_ to be here? That I want to be stuck in this fucking hell for six months before I can finally _die_ like I want to?”

Rey blinked at his statement, barely able to process it before he was storming away. The microwave beeped and dragged her back to the reality of her daily life, forcing herself to think ahead. She worked on preparing herself for work, although her mind incessantly wandered back to Kylo’s life; she wanted to know _why_.

He had been born into a good family from all she had read, that despite marital troubles, they had loved him, yet he had inexplicably abandoned them and joined an opposing company. Little was known about his childhood.

From all reports, he had left The Senate with no explanation and joined The First Order, working under the wing of the CEO, a man only referred to as Snoke. The First Order had been where Kylo first stood out to the public, where people began to question his detachment from his family.

Rey had learnt his general life history simply by googling him, but his reaction to being confronted by it confirmed her suspicions that it wasn’t the whole story. While she’d wanted to avoid getting involved in the spirit’s business for as long as she could, it seemed as if she was failing.

Kylo followed her to work, looming around the shop as she prepared everything for opening. Rey said nothing and he seemed pleased that he was allowed to brood without disturbances. She busied herself with customers, as limited a number as there were. As she considered his antics from the day before, she almost thought that Kylo would’ve given up with his hauntings. He didn’t.

During a mid-afternoon lull, Rey took to sweeping up some of the dirt and dust that had collected on the hardwood flooring. The weather outside was cloudy, but the weather wasn’t bad enough to warrant any drastic changes to her schedule. She was lost in her thoughts when the lights of the shop began to flicker, causing the hairs on the back of her arms to stand up.

Rey grimaced when she peered around the corner some nearby shelves and spotted the problem.

Kylo fucking Ren had his hands pressed against the light switch, gaze focused on the overhead lights. She glared at the spirit, broom in hand as she stepped closer. It seemed that turning on the television hadn’t been enough for him, he was making a proper effort at pushing his luck, both with her _and_ his abilities.

“What are you doing?” Rey wielded the broom and attempted to shoo him as if he was pesky cat. “Customers might see the lights and think there’s something wrong with our wiring.”

Kylo regarded her broom with a snort, tipping his head as the lights flickered overhead. “Is this distracting you?”

“You’re going to make me look like an idiot and like the shop is run by some child.”

Brandishing the broom, she poked at his corporeal form. He shifted away out of habit, frowning before he realized that she could do nothing to him. Kylo’s hand remained situated on the light switch as his gaze met hers again.

“Messing with my things in my flat is different than fucking up the business that I practically run.” Rey shifted into his space. Their forms blended and as her shoulder intersected with his, the air cool in the shared space. She flicked the lights off, sending the store into darkness. Light filtered in through the large, front windows, sending everything into long shadows.

They stood within the same space for several moments, Rey’s shoulder aligning with his and their chests halfway intersecting. Kylo, illuminated in his light blue tint, took on a different look in the darkness. In the low lighting, Rey could see how he must’ve looked in his mortal life, the outline of his profile, the way that he stood. It all looked _real_ despite his blue tint, his expression, his brown eyes so close. She was reminded of when she first saw him standing outside of her shop.

He seemed to think for a moment before he removed his hand, stepping away with a reserved expression.  

Rey flicked the lights back on and looked up at him, yet again made aware of their height difference. She had always considered herself slightly tall, certainly more than some of her friends from university, but compared to him, she felt downright short.

“Don’t do that again,” she scolded him.

Kylo had returned to his pacing and investigation of the titles. She briefly wondered what type of books a man like him might’ve read during his life, but quickly dismissed the thought, finding that line of thinking too humanizing for a spirit. Rey instead turned her attention to her mobile, responding to one of Finn’s texts.

She hadn’t exactly _told_ her friend that she could see and talk to spirits, instead, had dropped hints that she _did_ believe in them, that people went somewhere after death. If Kylo was going to be bothering her for the next six months, Rey wanted Finn’s support in enduring the hauntings.

She leant back into her chair as she considering methods for slowly introducing Finn to the idea of everything; she wanted to avoid a situation which ended with her friend brushing off her claims. She ultimately made plans with him to take place in two weeks; it wouldn’t be that Friday, but the next. She teased the idea of playing with a Ouija board she had tucked away in her flat and hoped that her spirit would play along for Finn’s sake.

The first week that Kylo lived with Rey, he was fairly innocuous in his attempts to haunt her. She mostly pretended to ignore him and cleaned his messes up without a word; they rarely spoke more than a few words to one another.

Despite trying to push him away, she couldn’t help as her thoughts would wander back to his life, his history, when she was doing menial tasks. Even with her experience telling her to disregard his presence, to continue on the path she started, Rey couldn’t erase the interactions they already had shared. Kylo already knew Rey in a sense, had begun to pry at exactly who she was.

The first free weekend Rey had with her spirit shadowing her, she opted to go for runs instead of staying in her flat. She listened to audiobooks from her phone as she took in the countryside outside of Jakku, glad to leave the spirit behind; he’d had better things to do with his time than follow her around. When she’d returned to her place she found him messing with the microwave and lamps, although he hadn’t managed to break anything in his escapades.

It wasn’t until the Tuesday after Kylo had entered her life, did she realize how much of a problem that he could be.

That night, after showering, Rey gave up and left her bedroom door open so that she could tell if her television was being fiddled with. The spirit had made a habit of turning it on with too high of a volume at odd hours of the night, forcing her to get up and shut it off. As he was able to pass through walls and doors as it was, she hardly saw the danger in keeping her door open. The spirit only gave her a look at the change but said nothing. Rey half wondered if he went for walks while she was in her bedroom before the change.

She fell asleep much like she had the previous nights, confident that the spirit would mind his own business and respect her decision not to help him move on. He hadn’t exactly accepted it so far, but she didn’t think that keeping the door would make any difference.

It did.

It was the middle of the night when Rey’s eyes snapped opened, taking in the scene in front of her all at once. She searched the darkness of the room, trying to find what had woken her up so suddenly. She first heard, then saw Kylo splayed out on ground, _laughing_ of all things, before her attention was turned to her dresser which he clearly had been messing with. While he hadn’t displaced any of the drawers, she heard a low humming coming from the bottom one-

She jumped out of bed at the realization of what he’d found, _somehow_ , and fumbled to turn her vibrator off. Blush burned its way up her neck and face and Rey felt like dying as she turned it off and tucked it back away, glaring daggers at the spirit on the floor. While her eyes had adjusted to the darkness, she still found his light blue tint unnerving and his laughter, a strange sound she hadn’t heard him make before, foreign. She was forced to stare at his prone form, mind struggling to come up with something more coherent than ‘fuck you.’

Kylo started up before she could get anything out, sitting up a bit as he ran a hand through his hair.

“I should’ve expected it, really, you, _all alone_ -”

“Fuck off! What were you doing? Rooting around in my things?”

“Christ, I’m not a pervert. I was just _looking_ at your bedroom, I passed through your drawer and,” he softly chuckled again as he stood up, “it started all on its own. The drawers are all closed, see? I can’t believe it took _this_ for you to talk to me again.”

Rey wrapped an around herself as she tried not to die from embarrassment on the spot. While she wasn’t ashamed to _have_ a vibrator, she had never expected Kylo to find it of all things. She wasn’t sure if she believed that it was by accident, but the genuine laughter she’d just witnessed seemed to support his story.

“Just get out! I don’t want to hear fucking BBC wake me up, either.”

“Or what? You’ll _banish_ me?” Kylo shook his head and looked at her, a smug smirk lingering on his features as he turned and left. “You’re very scary, Rey.”

In the morning, she was woken up by the television switching channels and groaned, nestling under the blankets for another half hour before she faced the music. She was glad that the spirit didn’t bring it up, leaving her to her shame.

The following week, Rey forced herself to accept that she would need the spirit’s cooperation to prove to Finn that spirits existed. Sure, she had been stubbornly ignoring his attempts at socialization, but that had seemed to encourage his attention-seeking antics; he’d slowly been progressing with the intensity of his hauntings.

Over the second week he would threaten to knock over her lamp, only to back off when she came running to save it. One of his favorite ones was turning her oven or microwave off when she was using them, giving an innocent look when she had to walk over and start all over again. While he always appeared annoyed by the lack of attention, he’d ended up falling into silence most of the time, almost as if he was meditating.

Rey closed the shop for her lunch break, closing the blinds and pulling out her sandwich. Kylo sat on the floor while resting on the shelf closest to her, seemingly lost in his thoughts. He had made it a habit to sit there while she picked over her lunch, occasionally peering over to see what it was. She half wondered if he missed eating.

“Kylo,” his head snapped up, gaze meeting hers. “I know I’ve been ignoring you and you’re… you’re clearly not happy with how things are going.” She wasn’t sure what type of reaction to expect from a man like him, but he simply frowned, straightening up how he sat. “Like I said, there’re reasons I don’t talk to spirits. I have my own life to live but that doesn’t mean that you have to be haunting me like this.”

Kylo just glared.

Rey sighed; he was still moping about the fact that she wouldn’t help him. She didn’t know if she could get past the suggestion that she get involved in corporate espionage or how he treated his family, but she was tired of trouble-making behavior.

“We might as well try and get to know one another besides, everything,” she tried again.  

“I’ve seen you live your life for two weeks, I think I know you.”

“Oh, like I know you so well from the ‘tabloids’?”

“I know you like too much creamer in your coffee and make just as much tea as would be expected, you hate BBC despite watching it on your laptop when you think I’m not looking, and you’ve got some friend who I’ve yet to see.” Rey blinked, leaning back in her chair a fraction. “See? It’s different.”

“And you’re happy with what I think I know about you?” He glanced away. “Right now, you’re just a big bad corporate man with family issues who’s haunting me until I go and murder his uncle, which I _hope_ isn’t the whole story.”

Kylo, although silent, appeared to be thinking instead of strictly ignoring her, something which she was grateful for.

“I do have a friend,” Rey confirmed, turning her attention to her sandwich. “And he’s going to spend the night this Friday, so I thought you could have some fun, if you wanted.” She took a bite and looked back at the spirit, surprised to be given such an intense look.

“You have a boyfriend?”

“Finn? No. He’s a boy who is my friend, but that’s it.” She used her thumb to wipe some crumbs from the corner of her mouth, watching his expression relax into simple scrutiny. “You might like him; he’s American too.”

“Just because we’re from the same country doesn’t mean that we’ll be friends.”

“Fine, fine, I was just trying. But I do know something you’ll enjoy about him.” Kylo tipped his head a fraction but said nothing, staring. “You get to make him believe in spirits.”

“ _Ghosts_ ,” he clarified.

“I have a Ouija board and when he comes over on Friday, we’re going to use it, and I need you to be there convince him. No real scares, though, just enough to believe.”

“You haven’t told him about your… abilities?”

“It would be awkward, wouldn’t it? Without any proof, at least.”

“And that’s all I am?”

“No,” Rey’s brows furrowed faintly at the accusation, “like I said, this is just something we can do together; I don’t think being strangers will help either of us.”

Kylo regarded her for a moment before he gave a short nod. He stood and stretched, even going so far as to crack his neck before he approached her. She watched as he leant against the counter, judging her meal.

“How is this going to work?” he asked.

She shrugged. “I just don’t think being strangers has gotten us to… a good place.”

“You want to be _friends?_ I never thought that I’d be Casper.”

“You’re not as friendly as him, don’t worry.”

“Oh, ouch.”

Rey snorted. “How’d you fare at work? Everybody hate you?”

“So now we’re digging into my personal life?”

“We’re trying to be friends, remember?”

“I’m not used to having friends.”

“I assume that applied to work friends, too?”

Kylo pursed his lips. “There was no one at work that I would consider one.”

“Clearly.” Finished with her sandwich, Rey cleaned up the counterspace and stood, glancing at the spirit. Because he was leaning against the counter, she found that they could look at one another on the same level. For brief moment, Rey found herself appreciating Kylo’s features at the new angle, noticing a few more beauty marks. “What was your work like?”

“What did you read online?”

“Just that you’re higher up in the chain, have given a few interviews, but no one’s really sure what it is you do. Paperwork’s my guess.”

“I did that, managed projects, ensured that things got done in time.” He shrugged. “I did a lot of things.”

The mess from her lunch tossed away, Rey settled back down in her chair, considering her next words very carefully. “So… what you want done to your Uncle, was that something you typically did?”

“You’re asking if I murdered people for a living?” He rolled his eyes before giving a small shake of his head. “No. This is just… a bad situation that needs to be remedied and being _dead_ , there’s no other way for it to happen.”

She frowned but withheld the urge to insult him; she’d finally got him talking again and he wasn’t being a terrible bother. “Did you enjoy your job?”

“Working for the First Order?” Kylo raised a brow. “I didn’t _enjoy_ it, but it was my job.”

“And yet you want to continue working for them, even in death?”

He shrugged, gaze landing behind her. “It doesn’t matter, I told you, he’s going to undo everything that I’ve worked for.”

Rey sighed, another wall. “What made you start working there?”

“I realized that I was wasting my potential under the thumb of my parents.” His expression flickered into a grimace before he stood to his full height, sizing her up. “What about you?”

“What _about_ me?”

“Why are you working here, in a bookstore, in Jakku of all places?”

“It’s convenient.”

“What about your family?”

“I have none.”

The spirit’s head tipped a fraction. “Even though your only friend doesn’t live here?”

“Finn’s not my only friend.” She lifted her chin. “And we met _after_ I moved here.”

“Did you go to college?”

It was Rey’s turn to look offended. “Yes, I went to uni. Got a degree in English Literature.”

Kylo raised a brow before stepping away, looking around the shop, unable to come up with another question. Although they had just reached a point of relative calm, their interaction from weeks ago still bothered her.

“I’m sorry, by the way,” the spirit glanced back at her, “about your father.”

Kylo’s expression fell and he looked positively neutral, although a sliver of resentment made its way through. “Don’t be.”

Rey drummed her fingers on the counter before giving a shrug. Back to that, it seemed.

“When Finn’s here, though, you can’t be too bad.”

“I’m not ‘bad.’”

“Don’t wake him up, or treat him poorly.”

Kylo gave her a look. “How exactly am I supposed to convince him that I exist, then?”

“Just makes the lights flicker sometimes, change the channel if we’re watching a show, I don’t know. I’ll give you a signal, maybe.”

The spirit glanced at her hand still resting on the counter. “We could try something and then you can decide if I’m ‘allowed’ to do the same to your friend.”

“What are you thinking, exactly?”

His hand brushed over hers and Rey froze as she _felt_ his thumb run along the back of her hand, the cool air making the entire experience even more surreal. She met Kylo’s gaze, nodding before she could stop herself.

“You can do that to Finn, if you want.”

“Oh, I will.”

She retracted her hand and resisted the urge to look it over, almost to confirm that it had indeed happened.

“Like I said, we can try and be friends, for now, I don’t think either of us want to be strangers hating one another.”

“But you’re still not willing to help me.”

“Come on, Kylo.”

Although he gave her a look of disapproval, the tension in the air from the last few weeks seemed to have dissipated. She knew that he was hoping to wear her down, or now it seemed that he hoped that she might feel some sort of obligation once they got to know one another? Rey just hoped he behaved around Finn.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I guess we'll have to wait to see how everything goes with Finn and our troublemaker ghost. Hopefully it goes well.
> 
> I always love to hear what people think so feel free to drop a comment or an ask; it really lets me know that people are enjoying the story!
> 
> [As always, you can find me on tumblr at kyloheyo. I also have another fic I'm working on; it's called An Empire's Fall if you're curious c: ]


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “You’re here already, aren’t you?”  
> “I sure am, sunshine.”

Friday evening arrived with little fanfare. In the morning Rey prepared her flat for her friend while Kylo kept an eye on things, ‘supervising’ as he called it. She prepared some sheets and a pillow for Finn, even getting the Ouija board out from the closet. She brought it down to the shop and during her lunch break and managed to convince the spirit to practice.

“I don’t understand what there is to practice for,” he muttered, standing on the other side of the counter. The board was set between them, Rey’s sandwich to the side of it.

“If it isn’t right, then Finn might not believe me.”

“What a tragedy.”

Kylo ignored her glare and when she finished setting up the board, noticed him eyeing the planchette. She placed her hand on it and then nodded to him. “Go ahead, try and move it with me.”

Rey had never actually used the board or its planchette before, instead it had been left at her dorm when she had been at university. She half wondered if it had been an inside joke, her roommates _had_ known that she believed in spirits, or if it had just been a coincidence.

Kylo’s hand brushed over hers before he placed his hand on the other side of the planchette, his gaze focused on it. Nothing happened, no push, no pull, and Rey wondered if he could do it, focus his energy onto such a small object, but then the planchette gave a small nudge. She felt herself smile and gently pushed back against him, raising a brow in his direction.

“Aren’t you supposed to say something to summon ghosts?” the spirit asked, moving the planchette to the ‘yes’ answer.

“You’re here already, aren’t you?”

“I sure am, sunshine.”

Rey made a face and held the planchette in position. “Don’t start with that after two weeks.”

Kylo gave a small smirk but instead of allowing him to push the planchette, she picked it up and pocketed it. It was his turn to make a face.

“Do you want me to start haunting the place up as soon as he gets here?”

“Not really, you’ve got to prove that I can actually talk to you, that you’re not just some reckless spirit,” Rey shrugged and picked the board up into its box. “Well, I mean, you _are_ , but that’s not the point.”

The lights began to flicker again and she sighed.

“You should be nice to your neighborhood ghost, _Rey._ ” She tried to ignore the way he said her name, like he was a friend, and instead gave him a another look as he rested his hand on the light switch.

“ _Please_ let me work in peace today, Casper.”

Rey sighed in relief as the lights returned to normal and she was given her space to work, even going so far as to pull a book out for Kylo. She set it on the counter and opened the cover, occasionally catching him testing his ability to precisely flip the page.

They had made a habit in the few days that they had been talking again, her setting out a book for him in exchange for less hauntings. As she shelved books she would hear him groan or curse; it seemed that when attempting to flip to the next page he would either shut the book or skip too far ahead.

He practiced with Anna Karenina, practice which Rey took to watching, occasionally. She found herself studying his expressions, watching him go from relaxed to stressed on a dime. He would look content while reading, only to frown and tense up when he couldn’t flip the page.

It was five in the evening when Rey made her way to the bus stop, hands tucked into her pockets as Kylo trailed behind her. She shifted excitedly, anticipating the moment when she’d finally be able to see her friend once more. Her spirit lurked about the bus stop, silent except for the occasional look, one she couldn’t place.  

It wasn’t long before the bus arrived and Finn stepped off, a broad smile on his face as soon as he spotted Rey. She waited until they stepped away from the meager crowd that had gathered to board before she hugged him. As his arms wrapped around her she could feel some of her nervous energy dissipating with it, although her and Kylo’s plan lurked in the back of her mind.

Finn had always been a friend that she could talk with about nearly everything, he hadn’t even laughed when she’d said that she believed in spirits. Seeing him again was a relief, and as they walked, she ignored the looks Kylo served their way.

“I can see you’ve been up late again, how’s business going?” Finn asked as the two made their way back to her flat, passing by the cozy homes of Jakku. His gaze lingered on Rey’s shop as they passed it, pausing for a moment before he looked at his friend. “Have any more grandmas come in looking for ‘Fifty Shades of Gray’ again?”

Kylo snorted, walking behind them. Rey had spotted the spirit taking stock of t her friend they made their way back, seeming to size him up.

“Not yet, thank god,” Rey hummed, unable to stop her gaze lingering where Kylo’s motorbike had crashed before the location quickly fell out of view, obscured by the shop. She looked back at Finn. “You remember how I told you about that accident right by the shop?”

“The guy with the motorcycle, right?”

“Yeah,” Rey opened the door to her building and they made their way upstairs. She paused at the door to her flat, keys in hand. Kylo stood beside her friend, seeming to be studying her expressions, making her blush in embarrassment despite herself. “I- I know I probably should have told you, but that’s not all that happened.”

Finn frowned and stepped closer. “Did you see it happen?” They both knew how gruesome motorbike accidents could be and she could see the gears in her friend’s head turning; he knew her well enough to know where the conversation was going.

“I-, yes.” Rey closed her eyes for a moment before she opened them again, faced with his serious expression. She tried to ignore the spirit lingering nearby, what he might think of her reaction. She turned and unlocked the door to her flat, letting it swing open. “I was there when he when he died.”

Finn moved closer and Rey sighed as she was pulled into another hug, her arms wrapping around his neck as he sought to anchor her. Kylo just stared, expression unreadable. Maybe it was better that way.

“You should’ve told me.” Finn’s tone was gentle tinged with concern.

“I know, I _know_ , it’s just been a lot, and there’s another thing I need to tell you.” They slowly parted and she held her friend’s complete attention. “Nothing bad, don’t worry. Let’s just get in, we can figure out what’s for dinner. I’ll tell you then.”

Rey stepped into her flat, ignoring the looks that she got from both her friend and Kylo. She instead worked on figuring out how she was supposed to bring up the fact that the man she’d watched die was still with them.

She and Finn settled into a slightly more comfortable mood, her trying to play off her moment at Kylo’s death, despite that it was the topic of the evening.

“Did you ever find out what his name was?” Finn broached the subject once more as they sat at her kitchen table, poking at some old take-out she had salvaged.

Kylo stood nearby, hands in his pockets as he started down at them.

“Yeah, did you hear about the death of Kylo Ren?”

“What? No, really?” Finn looked up from his meal. “I heard about him dying, but I didn’t realize that was _here_.”

“His poor mother.” Rey ignored the glare she got from Kylo.

“Oh, now you’re going to judge me with _him?_ ” The spirit frowned and moved over to the kitchen light switch, although she spoke before he could begin to mess with the lights.

“I can’t imagine how she must feel right now.”

The lights went off instead of simply flickering. Rey just sighed as Finn stared at the overhead light in confusion. “Issues with the wiring?” he guessed.

She shook her head, expression deadpan. If Kylo was going to give her an opening, she was going to take it. “No, I just think that this place is haunted.”

Finn frowned. “You’re kidding, right?”

“Maybe it’s Kylo; it’d make sense that he’d latch onto the last thing he saw before he died.”

“I’m not ‘latching onto’ you,” he countered.

The lights flickered back on and she raised a brow. “See?”

“You really think that someone like him would want to stay in Jakku? Why wouldn’t he head back and haunt his mother?” Finn chewed some of his day-old carry-out. “She’s already buried him you know.”

“Where?” Kylo asked, moving back to the table.

“Where at?” Rey asked, finding herself slightly disquieted by the news.

“Apparently next to his father, in a family plot out in some small town in New York. You’d think that he’d be out _there_ of all places.”

She could feel tension build around Kylo, watching him turn away from her in the corner of her eye. Rey resisted the urge to look at him, to say something that might prevent him from escalating. Her gaze remained trained on Finn, even as the microwave was pushed backwards into the wall.

It wasn’t a dangerous action, and the spirit had hardly moved it more than a few inches, but the thud it made caused Finn to jump in his seat. Rey ran a hand through her hair; at least Finn might start to believe in spirits after all.

“What the-?” Her friend stared at the small appliance as its time blinked to zero. Rey watched as Kylo stood with his back to her, breathing harsh before he spoke.

“What else has been going on with my family?” he managed to ask with some civility.

She sighed. “I don’t think he’s very happy about that development.”

“Rey, whatever’s going on,” Finn motioned to the microwave, “however you’re making this happen-”

“ _I’m_ not doing anything, it’s Kylo.”

“Look, we’re friends, but this has gone on far enough, this prank, whatever it is. It’s a horrible thing, what you saw, him, but thinking that he’s still around isn’t going to take away the fact that he’s dead. Now, I don’t know if this is your insomnia messing with your head again or-”

Rey leant back in her seat as she watched Kylo approach the table. He glared at Finn before he shoved his plate of food, sending it flying and crashing onto the floor. The plate shattered when it hit the faux linoleum and all three stared at the soggy mess and shattered sharp edges that decorated the floor and nearby wall.  

Finn spoke first. “What was that, Rey?”

“Finn, I told you, it’s not me.”

There was a brief silence as Kylo stalked over to the mess on the floor and silently began to crush it underfoot. As a spirit, he didn’t get any stains on his corporeal clothing, but otherwise the scene made a strange sort of sense to Rey. She had no idea how it must’ve looked to Finn, the food smearing and smashing its self with the plate bits against the floor. Maybe he thought it looked demonic.

Finn finally spoke up as Rey pushed herself away from the table and went to collect her broom and pain. “You better have one hell of an explanation for this, Rey.”

“I wish I did.” She moved to the mess and Kylo stepped away, resuming his lurking.

“What _else_ has been going on with my family?” He asked, standing between her and her friend.

“Do you know if his family has been up to anything else?”

There was a brief silence and Rey assumed that Finn was still shocked from the plate grinding incident.

“I think his uncle made a statement the other-” Rey’s previously stationary kitchen chair was shoved back and she heard it crash to the floor. Finn stood up and stepped away from the table. “Rey, are you serious? Is this really _the_ Kylo Ren?”

She watched the spirit as he stepped away into the living room. She let out a sigh of relief that at least he’d stopped where he had, although he still seemed to be ruminating about whatever his issue was with his family.

“I’m sure.” Rey turned back to the mess and worked on cleaning it up. As she worked she heard Finn clean up whatever food they had left, the sound of the refrigerator opening and closing a strangely comforting sound after Kylo’s outburst.

As they both finished up their tasks, she was left feeling unsure of how Finn was processing it all. She wondered if the Ouija board wouldn’t be enough after Kylo’s antics, or if telling her friend that she could see dead people would be too much.

Once the mess was cleaned up and the dishes were cleaned, the both of the friends silently thinking everything over, gave her friend a soft look. Kylo, at least, was sat on the couch, looking slightly less disturbed.

“We could do something, to ask him questions.”

“What, do you have a Ouija board?” Rey gave Finn an awkward smile. He gave her a look of disbelief. “No, really?”

“I’ve had it for a while.” She shrugged and moved to the living room. She passed the spirit on the couch and motioned to the board tucked underneath the piece of furniture instead.

“Look, I don’t even know if I believe what’s going on.” Finn stepped beside her and Rey tried not to take his disbelief personally, that even after the incident with the place, he didn’t immediately believe. She was almost offended, but then again, he wasn’t the one who could see Kylo as he sat on the couch.  

She bit her lip and moved closer to the couch, waiting a moment for Kylo to move, only to frown briefly when he didn’t. She sighed and felt the cold as her arms passed through his legs. “We can try it and if it doesn’t work…”

They set up the board on the kitchen table, the planchette set in the middle. While Rey knew that there was no harm in what they were doing, Finn still regarded the Ouija board with suspicion, eyeing up the planchette in particular.

The two friends stared at the board in silence for a few more moments and Kylo took the opportunity to make his way over.

Finn looked at the box that the board had come in, a small frown coloring his already tense expression. “Aren’t we supposed to say something to summon the ghost?”

“I’m already here, dipshit,” Kylo muttered, arms crossed.

Rey gave the spirit a look when her friend was distracted before quickly turning her attention to the board. “I think we both know that something’s already here, that we don’t need to ‘summon’ another.” Finn looked up from the box, gaze landing on her. She tried to calm herself and gave him a small smile “Let’s just give it a try.”

Rey put two fingers on the planchette and Finn followed her lead, clearly working to keep his weight off of the piece of wood and glass. Kylo waited a few moments, just enough for Finn to frown in anticipation before the spirit placed his hand on it. Rey felt it move before her and followed Kylo’s movement.

“You haven’t asked me anything,” he muttered as he lurked above them.

“We need to ask something, Finn,” Rey translated.

“It- it’s already moving.”

The planchette stopped and Finn stared at Rey, who proceeded to take her hand off of it. “ _I_ didn’t do it, just ask him something.”

Kylo sighed dramatically.

Finn was silent for a long moment, his hand still on the planchette. “Are you Kylo Ren?”

The spirit pushed the planchette to the ‘YES’ corner of the board, glancing at Rey as he did. She ignored whatever look he gave her, watching her friend with concern.

Finn, seemingly the only one with his hand on the planchette, stared in disbelief at the piece of wood and glass. He removed his hand and Kylo smirked, pushing the planchette along to the ‘H’, ‘E’, ‘L’, ‘L’, and finally ‘O.’

“What the hell, Rey?”

“This is the other thing’s been… happening since he died.” Kylo gave her a look and Rey glanced up, less hesitant in acknowledging the spirit’s presence around her friend.

“Do you think this is really going to help him? While I’m enjoying the theatrics…”

Rey turned her gaze back to Finn who stared at her strangely. “Finn, you’ve been my friend for the last year, I’m not lying when I say that not only do I know that’s Kylo’s here, I can _see_ him.”

Finn looked even more confused, while Kylo looked even more unimpressed. The spirit moved the planchette once more, quickly spelling out ‘SHE’S RIGHT.’

“Wait, he’s- he’s right here? You can see the dead man standing by us.”

“Finally,” Kylo sighed.

“He’s right here,” Rey looked at the spirit and motioned to where he stood, “Kylo’s been following us since the bus stop and he’s been… around since his accident.”

Finn blinked and she gave him a hopeful smile. “Hello?” her friend tried, looking in the space that Rey had motioned to, although Finn ended up staring at Kylo’s broad chest.

The spirit crossed his arms. “My eyes are up here.”

“You’re not- you’re looking at his chest; he’s fairly tall.” Rey stood and looked up at Kylo, the two sharing a look before she reached up and made a general motion towards where his face was. “He’s up here.”

“Hey, sorry.” Finn adjusted his gaze to where his friend had pointed out. “I didn’t realize you were here, before, talking about your family…”

The spirit sighed and looked at Rey. “What do you think is going to come out of this, that I’m suddenly going to make a new friend and stop haunting you?”

“Use the board, it can’t be that hard to make a friend, especially when your opportunities are as limited as they are.”

“I don’t _need_ friends.”

“I’d rather you didn’t think that I was your only hope.”

Kylo’s expression flickered to something she couldn’t identify before turned away, leaning down to the board. He moved the planchette, spelling out ‘FINE.’ Finn frowned.

“It’s fine,” Rey clarified.

“Have you always been able to see ghosts?”

“Ever since I can remember,” she gave Kylo a brief look before she sat back down. “People aren’t around forever, though, if someone does stay around as a spirit, it’s only for six months.”

“Thankfully,” Kylo chimed in. The spirit looked around the small kitchen and dinette area before he stared at Rey and she realized what he was looking for; she and Finn were sitting in the only two chairs at the small table. “I need a seat.”

“What about the floor?” She waved him off. “It’s not like you’re going to get dirty.”

“What?” Finn frowned and Rey turned bac to her friend.  

“Sorry, Kylo wants a chair or something, but he’ll live.” There was a pause as she realized what she said. “Or rather, he won’t, but he’ll be fine.”

The spirit took the planchette and spelled out ‘FUCK YOU’ on the board, causing Finn to furrow his brows and Rey to shrug. “Sit on the table if it’s such an issue, you won’t bother me.”

“Just because- you know what?” Kylo sighed and sat on the edge of the table, tipping his head as he met Rey’s gaze. “Better?”

“It’s fine with me.” Rey peered through the slight-translucent spirit at her friend who was frowning in concentration. “Again, sorry, he’s just now sitting on the table.”

“Oh!” Finn stared at the space above the table. Kylo crossed his arms.

“How are you going to spell anything like that, Mr-I-like-to-throw-food-around?”

“You really shouldn’t try and make that a ‘thing,’ Rey, you’re quite bad at it.”

“Oh sod off.”

“I take it you two don’t get along that well?” Rey blinked and looked at her friend. Kylo shrugged and reached over to Finn, brushing a hand against his shoulder. Finn jumped in his seat. “What was that?”

“Me, dumbass.”

“Kylo!”

“He should fucking _know_ that it’s me, since that’s all we’ve been talking about.”

“You don’t have to be a jerk for no other reason than you can!”

Rey barely noticed her friend’s stare. “I’ll take that as a no.”

“He’s… he’s actually been _haunting_ me.” 

“Why?”

“He wants me to help him pass on.”

“Because you’re the only one who can! If there was someone else, believe me, I would be there.”

Rey stood up, glaring at Kylo who was more or less eye-level with her. “I just want some peace and quiet around here and you want to pass on, but it looks like neither of us are going to get what we want. Just go have a pity party somewhere else.”

Kylo’s expression dropped back to something unreadable, something she could only describe as a mask. She wasn’t sure what she hated more, when he was carried away with his emotions or trying to suppress them completely.

Neither of them moved, gazes locked before Finn stood, walking over to his friend. He placed his hands on her shoulders, grip firm. “Rey, Rey, look at me.”

Rey frowned and finally looked at her friend, aware of Kylo’s gaze on her. “Yes, I’m looking.”

“Hey, he’s dead, right? He’s _dead_ , he’s going to be gone in six months, yeah? You’re strong, tough, _resilient,_ you can do this.”

Looking at her friend, Rey tried to clear her mind, tried to ignore the anger that flared up at the thought of Kylo’s insults. “Okay.” She let out a breath, gaze sliding back to Kylo. The spirit hadn’t moved, although his expression was almost- she didn’t want to know what about. “I can’t ignore him, Finn, that hasn’t worked for either of us, and this, this was supposed to be something that helped.”

“You’re just trying to be my ‘friend’ to get me off your back, is that it?” Kylo stepped closer, tone accusatory.  

Rey focused back on Finn when her friend spoke. “You’ve talked to him, right? You know him more than just a stranger, maybe?”

“We’ve tried a little about his past life, but he doesn’t want to talk about anything.”

The spirit scoffed, stepping closer, almost brushing up against Finn. “You dig into things at are none of your business and somehow I’m not allowed to have my own privacy?”

“When has _my_ privacy mattered to you? You’re around me almost all the time! The least you could do is let me get to know you, then wouldn’t be stuck awake all goddamn night thinking about it!”

Finn squeezed her shoulders and they stepped away from Kylo. Her friend drew her attention back to him with his soft tone of voice. “Whatever’s going on here, you two need to work it out or you’re going to kill one another. I don’t want to see you like this, don’t pretend like I can’t see how exhausted you are.” Rey closed her eyes and felt some of the energy drain out of her as she considered her friend’s words. “When was the last time you got a good night’s sleep?”

She gave her friend a tired look before the truth rushed out of her. “About two weeks ago.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi. That was a bit of emotional whiplash, now wasn't it? It also looks like Rey's been keeping her own secrets, hmm...
> 
> [As always, you can find me on tumblr at kyloheyo.]


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I don’t think he’d do that.”  
> “You know him that well?”  
> “No,” she sighed, “it’s just a guess.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone, my friend made a lovely edit for this fic, as did I, so if you'd like to check them out, here they are! 
> 
> http://kyloheyo.tumblr.com/post/163488793483/spacetrashdotgov-if-the-lord-dont-forgive-me 
> 
> http://kyloheyo.tumblr.com/post/163075817443/rey-knows-what-its-like-to-deal-with-spirits-the

Finn sighed. “Rey, you should have really picked up some melatonin before this.”

She looked away, avoiding whatever look the spirit might’ve been giving her. “You know it doesn’t help.”

Rey felt herself get pulled into a hug and closed her eyes, leaning into her friend as he spoke. “I’m sorry that he’s bothering you.”

“Thank you,” she murmured against his shoulder, taking in a few deep breaths as they held onto one another. It was only when they parted that Rey dared to look over at Kylo.

The spirit was staring at her, although thankfully his gaze less intense than it had been only moments ago.

Rey watched his gaze land on Finn for a moment before it snapped back to her. He didn’t look angry anymore, instead just tired. She wasn’t sure how to feel about the change in his demeanor and in lieu of calling out to him, remained silent as he turned and walked through the front door.  

“He left.” Rey surprised herself at how soft her voice was.

“For good?”

“I don’t think he’d do that.”

“You know him that well?”

“No,” she sighed, “it’s just a guess.”  

The two left the Ouija board in the kitchen and turned off the lights on their way out, returning to the comfort of the living room. They sat next to one another on the couch, the lamp to Rey’s right and Finn to her left. Although she turned on her television, she knew that she wasn’t about to avoid Finn’s concern.

“It’s only been two weeks, then?”

Rey leant back into her couch cushions. “It got worse when he showed up, I- I couldn’t stop myself from thinking about, well, him.” She frowned at the way she worded it, how much it implied. “I knew nothing about him the first night and was up googling him, whatever I could find. I even found pictures his mother released some time ago from when they were all together and-” she tried to stop herself from tensing up, from getting so aggravated, “they were happy! He actually _had_ a family!”

Finn looked on seriously, considering her words and Rey knew that he would understand. They had long ago talked about her childhood, he had sympathized when she’d previously met people like Kylo, someone who didn’t respect their family.

“Did I ever tell you that I worked as an intern for The First Order before I met you?”

Rey blinked, attention momentarily pulled from her own frustration. “No, I didn’t know.”

“It was my first internship, ever, really, and I was mostly just doing paperwork, but the entire time I was there, it was a surreal experience.”

“What do you mean?”

“I never saw Kylo and he never saw me, but I heard about him, about how if Snoke sent him to someone, then it was bad business.  

“What did he do?”

“He would just check someone’s work, lurk around,” Finn frowned, “but I heard that that Kylo was the last stop before Snoke and it wasn’t good to piss him off.”

Rey rolled her eyes. “He doesn’t do well under pressure.”

“He was always doing Snoke’s work, doing whatever he said. From what I heard, it sounded like he didn’t have a life of his own.”

“That would explain why he’s still so obsessed with his job.”

Finn frowned. “Are you okay with him bring around?” When she gave him a look, he gently shook his head. “I mean, does he scare you?”

“Kylo? No, there’s nothing he can do to me.”

“Besides keeping you awake and stressing you out?”

“That’s…” Rey sighed. “He’s not scary, he hasn’t tried to hurt me, not really.”

“’not really’?”

“He pushed a box on me, but I don’t think he was actually trying to hurt me.”

Finn gave her a look. “But he’s clearly stressing you out, making it harder for you to sleep.”

“I’m just- I’m doing it to myself, partially.”

“You shouldn’t have to worry about sleeping any more than you already do.”

Rey rubbed her eyes and sighed; Finn was right. “He doesn’t want to leave and he’s not willing to talk about anything.”

“What’ve you tired talking to him about?”

“I don’t know, life, his family.”

“Which he clearly is not happy with.”

“When nearly entire life history is online, it’s hard not to take an interest in it all.”

Finn’s brows furrowed. “What does he know about you?”

“I don’t know, the basics, that I went to uni, things like that.”

“But he didn’t know that he was keeping you up all night?”

“Why would I tell him? He’s not going to leave me alone just because of it.” She looked at her hands. “I’m the one who has the problem sleeping, after all.”

“You have to figure this out, Rey, you don’t deserve this pain.”

“I _tried_ to be his friend, tried to do something, _this_ , and look at what’s happened.”

Finn nodded and Rey felt his hand settle on her arm. “Maybe if you try to get on more neutral grounding, figure out _why_ he can’t deal with his family?” She gave him a look and her friend softened his gaze. “For your sake, okay?”

She ran a hand through her hair and nodded; her friend had a point. One try wasn’t enough for her to give up, to give into despair about her situation with Kylo. The better her relationship with the spirit turned out, the better she would sleep and it would all be less stressful.

“For my sake, maybe he’ll even turn out okay.” She glanced at her television and then to her friend. “You want to watch something?”

The two friends settled down, Rey grabbing them blankets and even making a large bowl of popcorn. They stayed up, eventually binging several episodes of Parks and Recreations until Finn called it a night. They set up his blankets and sheets on the couch and Finn hugged her once again. He gripped her shoulders when they parted and gave her a small, but encouraging nod.  

Rey, already in her pajamas, sat on her bed as opposed to her friend’s choice of sleep, mobile in hand as she scrolled though social media. She would eventually force herself to lie down, to try and count sheep, but the conversation with Finn still ran through her head. She knew that she had been a bit unfair with Kylo, even though he _was_ the one haunting her, she had _known_ that bringing up his family would agitate him.

Maybe eventually she would understand why he had thrown away everything she had ever wanted, why he was so committed to a job that he didn’t enjoy, and why he had been out riding his motorbike that day two weeks ago.

Rey couldn’t understand the situation the spirit had been in, what might’ve caused him to leave the hospital so soon after his father’s death, to leave his mother like that. Sure, she conceded, he might’ve been grieving in his own manner, but she still didn’t understand why he wouldn’t go to his mother. Rey understood the impulse the urge to run, to isolate herself, and so she couldn’t fully blame him for that, but something about his attitude rubbed him the wrong way.

Rey was known to run away from her problems on occasions, to get away from people and situations that were just too much for her to handle, but it had never involved going as far as Kylo had. She had Finn to run to, and if she had a family to comfort her, then she wouldn’t disregard their attention as the spirit had. Whoever Kylo had been in his past life, he seemed to still be holding himself to the same rigid expectations. Maybe once she knew why, she could work with him.

She needed to sleep, but Rey refused to lie down. After the incident in the kitchen, she knew that she wouldn’t be able to settle down immediately, anyway. She pulled out her laptop and procrastinated sleep until she spotted Kylo passing through her bedroom door.

The spirit stopped as soon as they locked gazes. Kylo looked exhausted and that was one thing that she decided that she could empathize with him on.

She shut her laptop, meeting his gaze. “You’re back.”

He took a few steps closer. “Where would I go?”

“I don’t know, home?” She knew that she was pushing her luck but the spirit just looked tired.

“That doesn’t exist anymore.”

Rey looked him over for a moment and set her laptop to the side. “Why?”

Kylo straightened up a fraction. “Whatever home there used to be, it’s been destroyed.”

“Am I allowed to ask why?”  

He frowned. “You didn’t want to know before.”

“I think it might help.”

“With what?”

“Like I’ve said before, it-” she shifted, “it would benefit the both of us to not be strangers.”

The spirit seemed to weigh the options before he stepped closer. “You didn’t seem to think that way when you brought up my ‘family’ earlier.”

“That’s why I’m looking for your side of the story.”

“ _Now_.”

“I’m trying, okay?”

Kylo stepped over to her bed and sat on the edge of her bed, staring at the floor. “I didn’t know that you had trouble sleeping.”

Rey glanced away. “It’s nothing new.”

They sat in silence for another moment, neither of them able to look at one another.

She finally looked up. “Would you be willing to talk again once Finn is gone?”

His brows twitched but he nodded. “There’s nothing you can do with whatever you learn.”

“I’m not aiming to hurt you, Kylo.”

The spirit sat up. “Is that so?”

“Is that really so hard to believe?”

He said nothing as he stood and made his way to the door. “I won’t disturb either of you this weekend and I’ll let you sleep tonight.”

“I’m sure Finn wouldn’t mind talking to you under… better circumstances; he’s nice.”

Kylo stood with his back to Rey. “We’ll see.”

“Night,” she murmured, more to herself than anything. Rey turned her bedside lamp off as he left, finally giving a sigh. Alone once more, she settled in under her blankets and stared into the darkness, slowly trying to encourage her brain to shut off.

Rey’s thoughts kept returning to Kylo, to Finn, and to what had happened earlier that evening. She couldn’t stop herself from trying to figure out _why_ the spirit still cared about what his old life was when he was free from all obligations, although he _was_ a spirit for a reason. Whatever was preventing him from moving on, she hoped he could overcome it soon enough, that it wasn’t really what he thought it was.

Rey managed to get three hours of solid sleep in the middle of the night and another from 6:00 to 7:00, although that time she woke up with the image of Kylo’s bloodied side at the forefront of her mind. After the sun started to filter through her curtains she gave up and pulled out her phone, scrolling along until around 9:00 when she heard Finn moving about.

She spotted Kylo sitting in the kitchen and they exchanged a look before she glanced at her friend. “He’s back, so you know.”

“You two are okay?” Finn looked concerned and she gave him a small smile.

“We talked last night, we’re fine.” She stifled a small yawn. “Got some sleep too, about four hours.”

“That’s something, right?”

The friends prepared scrambled eggs and toast together while Kylo watched in silence. The spirit eventually sat on the floor in the living room once Finn and Rey returned from breakfast. They all sat in relative peace, watching a nature documentary that Finn had found on some channel.

Rey was always aware of the spirit’s gaze on them, but he stayed quiet, seemingly content to listen to their conversations about the kangaroos in the documentary.

Eventually Finn expressed interest in Kylo again, wanting to know where he was and what he was doing. When he learned that the grouchy spirit had been with them for the entire morning, he sheepishly extending a greeting. Kylo shrugged in return.

“He says good morning to you too.”

Finn gave Rey a playful look. “He sounds so much nicer when you’re translating for him.”

“You’re more than welcome to use Ouija board to talk to him again if you’d like,” when they gave her a hesitant look, she shrugged. “I’ve no plans to interfere this time.”

Finn pulled out the box and then set up the board, leaving the planchette in the middle in invitation. Kylo gravitated closer, eventually sitting on the other side of the coffee table which sat between the couch and the television. The kangaroo documentary played behind him at a lower volume and Rey found herself amused by the spirit’s faint translucence; she could occasionally see a kangaroo hopping across Kylo’s form.

Her attention was drawn from the television as Finn cleared his throat, gaze on the planchette.

“I know you’re there, but, uh, how are you doing?”

Kylo rolled his eyes and placed his hands on the piece of wood, moving it about the board to spell ‘FINE.’

“Oh, that’s good. I hope we didn’t bother you too much last night, but you are good at the whole ghost bit, I hope you know.”

The planchette moved over to the ‘YES’ answer.

“So… you can make the lights flicker, move things around, can you do anything else?”

Kylo looked at Rey and she jumped in. “Remember when you felt something touch you last night? He can also do small things like that, make a mess of technology in general too.”

“What about passing through doors?”

“That’s a given.”

“Do you still look like when you were alive?”

He moved the planchette to ‘YES’ once more, although Rey piped in to clarify. “He’s a bit blue and I can see through him a little bit, too.”

Kylo glanced down at himself, giving a small frown. “You should be glad that I’m not how you found me.”

She shrugged. “I am.”

“What?” Finn asked.

“Oh, he just reminded me what he looked like when he died.” She tried to relax her posture. “I remember.”

Finn watched her for a moment, before turning back to the board. “Do you remember your last moments?”

His question was met with an immediate ‘YES.’

“I’m sorry,” her friend consoled the spirit, “it sounded pretty nasty from the reports and motorcycle crashes are always ugly. I have a friend who’ll ride them in the countryside and sometimes he’ll go out without his helmet…”

Kylo shrugged and Rey responded. “Who’s that?”

“Poe, I met him my first year when he was working on graduate school.”

“Oh! No, I remember you mentioning him a few times, he seems nice. Should encourage him to use his helmet more often, though.”

The spirit seemed to want to voice his own opinion and the planchette moved once more, spelling out ‘HAIR.’

“That’s exactly what Poe complains about too,” Finn gave the space where Kylo was a friendly look, “says that it gives him helmet hair and that it’s better to just go without.”

“Wouldn’t that get in your eyes?”

Kylo shrugged. “Not if you’re going fast enough.”

“Sounds safe.” She looked at her friend. “Kylo like to speed.”

“He might’ve liked Poe, then,” there was a brief pause as Finn considered it all, “what else did you do when you were alive, besides speeding and work?”

The spirit frowned at Finn and the planchette remained motionless.

“ _I’m_ addicted to Instagram,” her friend confessed, although Rey had long ago learned about Finn’s small community on the platform. “You don’t even have a Facebook, though, so what’d you do?”

The planchette eventually spelled out ‘WORK’ and the two friends silently stared at it before Finn nodded. “Work it is.”

They spent a few more minutes going back and forth about small things in Kylo’s life, like his favorite color, which Rey learned was dark blue. The board was put away and Finn offered his mobile up to the spirit, setting it on the coffee table and suggesting that Kylo try and type something on it. Kylo took the opportunity and although he tried to type text on the screen, nothing happened except for the occasional flickering.

Rey suggested they all go for a walk despite her tiredness; she was used to forcing herself to do morning runs on little to no sleep and a walk was nothing compared to that.

As they set out and made their way around Jakku, she enjoyed spending time with her friend as the spirit simply lurked several meters behind them. She didn’t know if it was because he was too stubborn to be excluded but too unwilling to socialize to join them, or that he just didn’t want to be alone.

Finn probed into what else Rey might have known about Kylo while the spirit gave them space, and she filled her friend in on his general temperament and her confusion about his obsession with work. After explaining what she could, Rey grew tired of talking about Kylo and switched over to her friend’s life and uni.

She inquired into his most recent courses and how his classmates were, and learned about some of the classroom drama that had occurred recently. They normally talked about those sort of things, school, work, Rey’s business, the future; adding a spirit to the mix was just another topic for them to tackle.

Finn’s time spent in Jakku was much like it had been other times he had visited, they walked about, got coffee, talked about life, and generally tried to plan for what they would do the next time they were together. Rey would occasionally go to the capital and during those times they would have more to do, but those occasions were more of a rarity.

By mid-Sunday, Rey agreed that she would keep Finn updated about her haunted condition, that she would call him if anything ‘bad’ happened, although she was doubtful that it would. She promised to try and get as much as she could, that she would text Finn if she was having any more issues.

Kylo had fallen back into his sullen and silent mood while her friend was around, occasionally messing with technology, but otherwise just ignoring the living as much as they ignored him.

When she saw her friend off at the bus stop, Rey tried to ignore the look that the spirit was giving her, how he seemed to study the way that she waved farewell to Finn. The bus pulled away and she was once again left alone in Jakku, Kylo standing at her side with his arms crossed.

He glanced up at the sun peeking through the otherwise cloudy sky. “And you two just met because he stopped in your shop?”

“Yeah.” Rey bit back the urge to ask how _he_ made friends. “I had the best deals for the textbooks he needed and he always came here for his assigned readings.”

“And he never tried to hit on you?”

“Maybe, but that doesn’t really matter now.” She gave him a look before trying to subdue her tone; she _was_ out in public and if someone saw her talking to herself, well. “You’ve seen us together, we’re just friends and we’re fine like that.”

Kylo shrugged and she backed off, crossing the street to the row of houses and her flat. As they crossed, she blinked as something occurred to her, although she managed to remain silent until they crossed the threshold of her flat.

“Do- did you have a girlfriend? When you died?”

The spirit snorted, although Rey was almost certain she saw him correct a misstep. “No one’s mourning my death.”

The urge to bring up his family reared its head and she just gave him a look. He shrugged and so she tried to let go, to move on. “What about your work? How will that go now that you’re gone? You must’ve been hired for a reason.”

“Snoke saw potential in me.” She tried to ignore the way that his tone unnerved her yet again, the visible shift in his _self_ that occurred. “But he’ll be able to continue on without me.”

“But he won’t be able to deal with your uncle?”

“His expectations were that I would finish what he started, that I would stop Skywalker from releasing the information that he has.”

“He hasn’t released it yet, last I checked.”

Kylo’s brow twitched. “That doesn’t mean that he won’t.”

Rey bit her lip and remained standing. “Do you even know what it is?”

“I know that it is a danger to the work of The First Order.”

“Kylo,” she tried his name again, more gently than she had before, “you know that you’re dead, right? You’re free, you’ve no obligation to your work, no reason to try and get this mission of yours done.”

There was a long pause as he stood perfectly still, the two of them standing only a few feet apart as he stared down at her. She half wondered if he would just get angry again out of pure frustration.

“It’s too late to turn back, to stop. Just because I’m dead doesn’t mean that I’m done.”

Rey stared at him for a long minute, mind churning as she tried to reconcile what she knew of him with his words. Whatever environment he’d been at in his workplace, it had affected him so deeply that he lived and breathed it, that even in death he felt an obligation to the company. From the sounds of it, it was almost as if he hadn’t had a life at all, only mild interests and hobbies that never stopped him from being able to do his job.

She gave him a small, pained look. “Can we talk more about this later?”

Kylo remained sharp. “If you want.”

Rey settled on the couch and he joined her on the opposite end.

“Did you want to know more about me?” She tried to work the conversation back a more comfortable mood. “I’ve been asking loads of questions about you and I’ve just been… here.”

“What should I know about you?”

Rey blinked. “I mentioned before that I don’t have any parent; I’m an orphan.” Kylo stared. “I grew up doing what I could to make money for myself, mostly that involved fixing up machines and vehicles. Oh, I have a car of my own, actually; I don’t think you’ve seen me use it.”

“Where is it?”

“It’s just parked outside, I’ll show you next time we’re out there.” She looked down for a moment. “I was tempted to get a motorbike but it’s just not economical.”

“That’s the idea.”

“How long have you driven them?”

“Motorcycles? Since I was fourteen.”

“I though you started learning at sixteen in America.”

Kylo’s expression flickered to something akin to sadness before he blinked away the emotion. “Fifteen or sixteen is the norm, yes, but people will sometimes let their kids drive before that.”

“I’m sorry the weather was so bad that day, then.” Rey tried to blink away the image of Kylo lying dead on the ground, the blood-

“Don’t be. I wasn’t paying attention, I should’ve known better.”

“Where were you going?” After the death of his father, maybe he had just been running away.

“Nowhere.”

They weren’t looking at one another, instead their gazes were trained on their own respective walls. Rey felt that instead of getting to know him, she was pulling teeth and rubbing salt in the wounds.

She tried again. “Is there anything else that you want to know about me?”

Kylo’s gaze remained on the wall. “What’s your insomnia like?”

“I just, I just can’t sleep.” She shifted and faced him. Rey was relieved that his expression mirrored her own, serious and focused, that they were both finally on the same page. “I start to think about things, anything, everything, and I can’t get it to shut off. I also have nightmares, but I manage. Melatonin helps me get to sleep, but it doesn’t solve everything else.”

The spirit nodded, features softening just a fraction. “What are your nightmares about?”

“You.”

He blinked. “Before that?”

It was Rey’s turn to hesitate, to think over her words before she set them free. “Life, everything.”

“You shouldn’t have to deal with that.” She wasn’t sure what to say and found herself nodding along. “Although never sleeping _is_ one of the perks that come with death.”

She felt the reminder in her chest and something else twinged as she felt the implication of his answer. “Are you glad that you’re dead?”

Kylo shrugged, expression tired. “It’s how it is.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh dear, these kids and their drama; why can't they just communicate? Seems like it's harder than either of them realize. 
> 
> [As always, you can find me on tumblr at kyloheyo :) ]


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Would you rather be dead?”   
> “That’s a loaded question, Rey.”

Rey tried not to immediately let herself over-analyze what information he provided, although as her resolve continued to crumble, she was sure that it would happen later.

“What do you do at night?” She had often speculated about his actions, half wondering if he just went out and scared people in their homes.  

“I’ve been walking around Jakku ever since my first night here; it keeps me busy.”

“All night?”

“My muscles don’t get tired.”  

The watched as Kylo tried and failed to hide a grimace. “What about mentally?”

“I’m dead, aren’t I?”

“If you hadn’t gotten into business, went to work for the First Order, whatever you do for them, what would you have done?”

Rey should’ve expected the frown that Kylo gave her, that he was nowhere close to ready to answer such a question. In lieu of waiting in silence as his frustration built, she spoke up, turning her gaze to her hair as she opted to braid it. It gave her something to do with her hands.

 “I’d have my own shop, I think.” She felt his gaze land on her. “I should’ve gone for proper training with a mechanic, become an apprentice; there’s always work in that area, not like practically being a librarian.”

“But you didn’t?”

“I didn’t, just focused on school, literature, and other worlds.”

The spirit said nothing, his expression remained serious as he considered her words. Rey wondered what he thought of her life, if he thought she’d wasted it, if becoming a mechanic would’ve been wasting it as well. She held back with her thoughts and instead and finishing doing her hair up in a loose braid. When she finished, satisfied with her small project, she reached over to the coffee table and grabbed a book.

The action seemed break Kylo out of his concentration; his gaze snapped to hers. Rey was used to being under his gaze, being watched and observed, and so she relaxed further into the couch cushions. She opened her book and peeked over the edge at him, their gazes locking once more.

A moment passed before Kylo leant back as well, legs stretched out in front of them.

Rey’s current book was a series she had seen when she was younger and hadn’t had the chance to get through, _The Ranger’s Apprentice_. She’d managed to find people who showed interest in buying parts of the series as well and she’d justified buying the entire series and reading it once and for all.

She found the premise interesting enough and the world that the author created, although it was really the way that it all tied into itself that interested her. She always was one to get lost in what she was reading, and coupled with her near-perpetual exhaustion, she had found herself waking up from a nap she had never planned on.

It wasn’t until Rey jolted awake with her face in her book did she realize that she’d fallen asleep. She blinked and sat up, taking in the shadows cast across her apartment. Checking her phone, she saw that it was almost six in the evening; she’d been asleep for nearly three hours. It wasn’t like she didn’t need it, but falling asleep in such an awkward position hardly meant that she had enjoyed it, neck sore and back stiff.

Rey sat up and stretched, yawning and spotting her friendly neighborhood spirit still seated in the same position. His head was tipped back against the top of the couch and his eyes were closed; if she didn’t know better she would’ve thought him asleep.

“Morning, sunshine,” Kylo murmured.

“I- I try not to do that so often,” she yawned and gave him a one-over, “napping like that can mess up my schedule. Did you just sit there the entire time?”

“It’s as close to sleep as I can get.”

“Could’ve used my bed.” Rey pushed away the implication that came with it. “I mean, while I’m not there.”

“I was under the impression that your room was off-limit since, well, _the incident_.”

She rolled her eyes at the memory. “It’s off limits when I’m in there, unless I invite you in. Just don’t mess with anything while you’re in there and fine, yes, you’re allowed in there, as a friend.”

Kylo blinked and opened his eyes, peering at her from his position. “As a _what_?”

She grabbed the remote and turned her gaze to the television screen. “We’re trying to be friends, aren’t we? That’s what friends do, isn’t it, trust?”

“Is that what we are now, officially?”

“Unofficially, too.” Rey let out an amused huff. “What do you want to watch?”

They ended up settling on watching Netflix; Rey had learned that Kylo had never watched House of Cards and he’d been vaguely interested by the idea so it’d been easy enough to sell him on the idea. Realizing that she hadn’t had dinner, she made a sandwich and settled back on the couch. She watched in amusement as Kylo slowly became engrossed in the show, able to even tell a few stories that were eerily similar to Frank’s ‘adventures’.

While they watched the show, Rey couldn’t help but make the occasionally joke at the sake of the American government. This in turn earned snarky responses from her spirit friend, making their time watching the show more enjoyable than she’d anticipated.

The pair ended up watching six episodes before Rey forced herself up from the couch. Kylo stood as well, stretching out beside her, finally just stopping and staring.

“What?” Rey asked, standing arms crossed in her pajamas.

“We should do this again.”

“Tomorrow night?”

“If you’d like.”

“I would.” Rey yawned loudly, opting not to cover her mouth or excuse it. Instead, she just gave him a small, tired smile. “I’ll see you in the morning.”

He gave a small nod. “Sleep well, or, at least try to.”

They parted ways and she soon settled into bed. Doing so, Rey could feel exhaustion pulling at her mind although it’s wasn’t nearly enough to convince her that she’d be able to sleep. Instead, her mind wandered and she continued to ruminate.

A strange feeling spread through her chest as she though back to their time together, how easy it had become to relax in his company. The evening they spent together felt much like her time with Finn, bonding over shared interests and getting to know one another, although there always seemed to be an edge with Kylo. While she pushed the limits that she could, she knew that his tendency to shut down could kick in at the wrong subject, although nothing like that had happened that evening.

While he’d been snarky and tired while watching the show, he’d show interest in her thoughts and seemed amiable enough when explaining some of his work. Rey struggled to match that up with the man who, days ago, had knocked plates to the floor because his family had been brought up.

Alone in the darkness of her room, she caved into her impulses and pulled out her mobile. She searched Kylo once more, going over previously known information before moving onto the image results. She found herself amused at some of the candid pictures of him that were online, images showing him frowning at people or just making frustrated faces in general. In her time around him, she’d been witness to most of such expressions.

As she flicked through images, she found a few that included Snoke, a man who looked severe and even a bit unsettling. In the pictures that they were sharing a space, Kylo looked to be focusing on the older man, deferring to him.

Rey frowned as she tried to work out why Kylo cared so much about what Snoke thought, why he would continue to work for his company even if it wasn’t something he enjoyed. From the very beginning, his devotion to his work and disregard for his family life rubbed her the wrong way. From various articles online, she knew that her ghostly friend had cut off contact with his parents and suddenly defected to The First Order after graduating from college. Why he would want to something like that, however, she didn’t understand.

Continuing to peruse the internet, Rey consistently found herself surprised when articles used Kylo’s birth name, Ben Solo. She’d run across it before and hadn’t paid it much attention, but at one am, she couldn’t help herself but wondering who Ben Solo had been. He seemed happy enough from what she read of his mother’s interviews, although Rey felt that she was missing a part of the story. There was an undercurrent to many of the articles, something that was implied but never outright mentioned, and she frowned as she tried to work it out.

She went back to stories of his family and there seemed to be nothing new, nothing that stuck out to her. It was only after another hour of digging amongst online articles that Rey found the first mention of Anakin Skywalker. The name didn’t mean much to her until she found an article raving about how said man was a murderer. Before Anakin had killed his wife, Padmé, he had been a successful businessman, and the way that they described him at work eerily reminded Rey of Kylo. It seemed that despite the great publicity that had occurred at the time of the discovery, the Skywalkers and Organas had done their best to suppress it, as it hadn’t been brought up in any capacity in many years.

Rey drew her knees closer to her chest and her eyes strained in the darkness as she read the piece. It had comments from both Luke Skywalker and his sister, Leia Organa. It seemed that at the time, there had been a whirlwind of coverage as both siblings dealt with their public lives coming under attack for even being related to the wife-killer.

They’d been adopted to separate families after the death of their mother, and as everything had come to light, it had cause disruptions in each of their respective lives. While there had been an investigation into Anakin’s motives, the official investigation had not included them in the report. In the end, Anakin had died before Kylo, Ben, whoever, had even been born; he’d gotten cancer and Luke had even gone so far as to visit him on his deathbed.

Exhausted and thoroughly confused, Rey wondered how one could grow up with the image of their grandfather being a murder hovering over their shoulder, how much Kylo had even known about it growing up. She couldn’t imagine how his parents could avoid talking about such a well-known figure, someone who had once dominated his area of business and then subsequently blown up the news.

As she had earlier, a deep-set tiredness made it impossible for her to keep her eyes open any longer, and finally she let herself relax and sink into her mattress. It wasn’t long before Rey blinked awake to morning light filtering in her bedroom and sighed. At least she’d gotten some sleep.

She didn’t bring up the fact that she’d discovered the truth about his grandfather, unsure if the spirit would react in the same way as when she brought up the rest of his family. Rey attempted to maintain some sense of stability between the two, attempting to keep their relationship steady. Instead, she let things continue as normal, at night digging up more and more.

In the shop Kylo slowly became more willing to offer his opinion on the books that he recognized, praising ones that he’d spent time and enjoyed. Rey was more amused when he would criticize books she’d never have thought to touch, laying accusations on them that were so absurd to her that he made her laugh more than once. While she would unpack some of their stock, the spirit would read off the back of subpar romances, voice always heavy with sarcasm. Rey found herself enjoying his company in the shop more than she had before, even when he was just sitting and reading, he was someone to talk to.

If they weren’t mocking books, then they ventured into the area of asking one another questions that friends with. She eventually asked him what he took in his coffee and he countered by asking how she could drink so much tea, an offense which prompted her to drink tea every evening for the rest of that week.

They made it a habit of watching shows that one of them hadn’t seen, Kylo chiming in with suggestions that often threw her. While several of his suggestions were thoroughly morose and dark in tone as she expected, Rey was amused to learn to that he also enjoyed shows like Parks and Recreations.

“I never expected you to have a sense of humor,” she hummed as they finished the final episode of the night, nearly two weeks after they’d started the habit. Rey had taken to stretching out across the couch to be as comfortable as possible, her feet and part of her legs sharing the same space as Kylo. The action had initially been to annoy him, but when he hadn’t cared that he was essentially sitting on her feet, she’d made it her new position on the couch.  

“I can find things funny even if it’s only in limited exposure.”

She snorted and turned off the television, stretched out on the couch in her pajamas. Kylo, glowing a faint blue tinge, still sat at her feet and she wiggled her toes; she’d realized long ago that both of them got a kick out of the weirdness of the situation as he toes moved _in_ his leg.

“What’s that even supposed to mean?” she finally asked.

There was a brief pause before he shrugged. “I don’t know.”

Rey laughed and the spirit smirked, the closest expression to a smile that she’d ever seen him make. “It’s almost been a month,” she murmured, staring at his profile in the darkness. She’d seen plenty of pictures of him alive and they never seemed to do him justice. She glanced away. “Is this still hell?”

Kylo sighed and she knew that he had been working hard to forget that he’d even said anything. “I’m glad that we’re not fighting anymore, at least not as much.”

“Would you rather be dead?”

“That’s a loaded question, Rey.”

She closed her eyes, trying to settle into the couch and nap like she had before. Rey half wondered if she could will herself to pass out at that moment. She couldn’t. “I know.”

Maybe it was the darkness, the fact that she wasn’t looking at him, or the fact that they’d just been watching a Parks and Recreations and Game of Thrones all night, but he responded, sounding tired as always.  

“I’ve enjoyed my time at your shop more than I thought I would. And I know- I know you too well to think that I can change your mind about seeing my uncle.”

“You’ve no plans to leave, still?”

They’d just briefly touched on the subject a few days ago, about the possibility of Kylo taking off and doing whatever he wanted, away from her, although he hadn’t given her a definite answer.

“I don’t have any, no.”

Rey slowly sat up, wrapping her arms around her legs. “I’m glad.”

She wondered how much he could see of her in the darkness, if he could tell how she’d began to appreciate his company around the shop, however much she knew that it was a bad idea. He was still a spirit after all, still temporary, still going to disappear on her in five months.

“I hope you end up somewhere nice,” she tried again, trying to push her thoughts away, giving him a small, tired smile. “When you pass on, whatever that might mean to you.”

Kylo had sat up some, arm resting on the back of the couch as he met her gaze through the darkness. “Do you think that there’s any difference where people end up, the people who complete their unfinished business versus those who don’t?”

“I just know that people, when they’re at peace, they fade away right away, and they can feel it coming.” She chewed on the inside of her lip. “People who don’t get anything done, well, they fade away as well but typically they’re just…” The spirit’s gaze remained trained on her. “Are you really sure that finishing off your uncle is really the answer?”

There was a stretch of silence as Rey watched his jaw clench and then relax; he finally looked away as he spoke. “If it’s not that, I don’t know what it would be.”

The temptation to suggest reconciling with his family reared its head although he knew better than to bring it up at the moment. There never would be the ‘right’ moment to do so, but as it was she was too tired to fight him on it. Despite that, she knew that it must’ve been bothering him, that killing his uncle wasn’t the solution he’d previously convinced himself it was.

“I don’t know, either, Kylo.”

They sat together in silence for a few moments before he looked back at her, a fraction of a smile ghost across his features. “Don’t worry about it, sunshine.”

Rey stared at him, unsure of what to say. She gave him a smile in lieu of a response and stood, stretching before saying goodnight and heading to her bedroom.

She knew that becoming friends with him, getting so used to and reliant on his company would only result in pain when he was gone. And yet, even as she realized that she forgot to leave a show running for him and ran back to start one up, she couldn’t stop herself.

Rey couldn’t stop herself from throwing him a soft smile as she wished him a good night once more, couldn’t stop herself from catching his grateful nod, and couldn’t stop herself from thinking about him as she went to bed.

Becoming friends with Kylo Ren hadn’t made sleeping any easier, either. While she could rest easier knowing that the spirit wouldn’t disturb her, that she’d learnt so much about him, the nightmares about his death still persisted. There was no way for Rey to _stop_ herself from thinking about Kylo, and so the there was no way for the nightmares to stop.

Maybe, Rey consoled herself that night,  she would learn something new from this experience. She had gone down the same path before, befriended and bonded a spirit only to end up hurt when it hurt they passed on. Even if things were only bound to end in pain with Kylo, she hoped that she ended better off for it than last time. That, of course, was hardly likely, but she pushed the thoughts of her mind as she closed her eyes.

It was a couple of a days later as Rey was closing the shop, Kylo lurking behind the front desk, that he posed a question which she hadn’t considered for years.

“Are there really others like you out there, people who can see ghosts?”

“I don’t know.” She finished closing the front window blinds and walked up to the counter. “There are people out there, mediums, whatever, who _say_ that they can, but I’ve never tried to see if they’re… legitimate, or anything.”

“You’ve never tried to do anything with your abilities?”

“No.” Rey met his gaze, as intense as ever, and glanced away as she thought back. “I’ve looked things up before, about people who claimed they could, but no one’s ever encountered things like me.”

“Do you think they’re lying about being able to see ghosts?”

She pursed her lips. “I think that some of them might believe what they see, that others might just lying to their audience because they can. Either way, people can convince themselves of a lot of things, and people who go to the mediums are desperate to hear anything at all.”

He nodded, giving Rey a look before continuing. “And spirits offer nothing in most cases? Is that why you didn’t want to bother with me in the first place?”

“I told you, I’ve my own life and my own responsibilities, I can’t go flying all over the world at the drop of a hat.”

Kylo took a step closer, halfway through the counter and square in front of Rey. She didn’t step back, just looking up at him with a small frown. They’d touched on the topic when they’d first met and weeks ago, but bringing up spirits never brought good news. If he was having a go at her in an attempt to convince her yet again, then she wasn’t about to let herself be goaded.

“And you’ve never tried to help?” he pushed.

“Of course I have.” She curled her hands into fists and stared up at him, trying not to get ahead of herself; he didn’t _know_ everything that had happened to her. Then again, he was suggesting that she had just sat by while countless spirits suffered around her. “In most cases there’s nothing that you can do for them, that all I do is make it worse, that both of us are worse off.”  

The spirit’s brows furrowed. “And what about me?”

Rey sidestepped the question. “If there was someone else who could see you, if there was someone else like me, would you go to them instead?”

His answer came in one breath. “No.”

“Then I’d say that being around me is helping you enough.” She stared up at him, trying to ignore the way that his brows furrowed, how he worked to maintain control of his expression.

“Enough for what?”

“Enough for the situation.”

Kylo shifted closer and Rey wondered for a brief moment if he might phase straight through her.

“And what might that situation be?”

She wanted to throw the fact that he had no idea what he needed to pass on back in his face, the frustration of everything coming out of nowhere building. Instead, she sighed, letting the tension simmer in the back of her mind. Kylo was certainly making enough of it as it was and she wouldn’t do the situation good by adding to it, no matter her frustration at his ignorance.

“ _This_ , whatever it is, whatever friends we might be at this point. I’ve no idea what I can do to help you, to make this easier on the both of us, but I hope it’s enough.”

Rey blinked at what her statement, realizing what she said only moments after. Her anger was still there, continuing to brew, but his situation had to be addressed one way or another. She knew that in the beginning he had wanted to be gone, he never had wanted to stay with her, and yet now he lingered.

“Do you think that I’m worth it?” Kylo asked, shifting a fraction closer and leaning down so that their faces were closer. “That even after everything I’ve done, to you, whatever might’ve happened before, that you’d rather have me around than gone?”

There was a pause as he gave her a moment to think, her gaze finally returning to him after a second of ruminating.

“Yes,” she decided, trying not to read too much into the intensity of his gaze, “I do.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SORRY for the long wait, life has been stressful and sometimes this doesn't come as easily as I'd hope it would. As always, thanks for reading and let me know what you think! 
> 
> [If you're interested, you can find me on tumblr at kyloheyo]


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